SHOW PREP DECEMBER 16, 2008
HOLLYWOOD 411 . . .
Christina Hendricks, 33 – who plays the bombshell head secretary on AMC’s Emmy-winning Mad Men – is engaged to actor Geoffrey Arend, her rep tells PEOPLE exclusively. Arend, 30, plays an ad man on TNT’s upcoming drama Trust Me, which premieres in January. The couple has not yet set a wedding date. (People)
Rumors that Mariah Carey is pregnant have gathered pace after she decided to scrap an upcoming world tour. Mariah Carey has added fuel to rumors that she is expecting her first child by canceling plans for a world tour an insider has told New York Daily News. “Costume designers and dancers were all called Wednesday and told the tour is off,” the source explained. “Most were hysterically crying because they were relying on her for a paycheck this holiday season.” While US tabloids were quick to see the connection to the cancellation to pregnancy rumors a rep for Mariah set the record straight. “A tour was discussed, but nothing was confirmed,” they explained. “I have not been told she’s pregnant.” (Handbag)
Who needs hot Hollywood clubs? Taylor Swift’s birthday bash Saturday was a low-key, homemade affair. The star celebrated her 19th surrounded by family and friends – including all the members of her band – at her home in Hendersonville, Tenn., the singer’s rep tells PEOPLE exclusively. Swift, who lives with her parents and younger brother, planned the buffet dinner, which included sushi, mini beef Wellingtons and bacon-wrapped scallops. Two ice cream cakes (one chocolate peppermint, one cookie dough) came from Cold Stone Creamery. The singer entertained the crowd with a homemade video she made featuring many of her pals. Later, the 40 partygoers battled it out in a ping-pong tournament, won by Swift’s manager. (The “Love Story” singer made the semi-finals.) The night’s grand finale? S’mores (one of Swift’s faves) cooked up over an outdoor fire pit. (People)
Recently split Guy Ritchie and Madonna are to spend Christmas together with their children. Madonna and Guy Ritchie will spend Christmas together for the sake of their children sources have told the Daily Mail. “Madonna and Guy want the best for the kids and so she has decided to come over to the UK so they can be with their father,” an insider claims. “Guy is happiest with his kids and in the countryside. Because of what the kids have been through this year he wants to treat them to a really special Christmas with stockings of presents and a big tree. He is planning on having a traditional turkey dinner – although all the food will be organic at Madonna’s insistence. Madonna doesn’t really like Ashcombe but she thinks it’s important that they put on a united front for the kids. She will, however, be eating a different meal as she will only eat fish. She will also be working out on Christmas Day.” (Handbag)
Lauren Conrad. Audrina Patridge. Heidi Montag. Who’s the fairest of them all? “I think they’re all beautiful,” Brody Jenner told Usmagazine.com at the Z100 Jingle Ball 2008 concert in NYC Friday. Jenner, 25, also has nothing but well wishes for his pal (and Lauren Conrad ex) Doug Reinhardt, who is now dating actress Amanda Bynes. “Good for them,” he said when asked about the two. “I hope they’re very happy.” Meanwhile, Jenner is gearing up for his new MTV reality show, Bromance, premiering later this month. “Bromance is about bros. It’s not really about dating,” he told Us. “People get to see what a bromance is when they watch the show. It’s a special bond between two males. There’s Punk’d elements, Superbad, fireside margaritas with these guys, awkward guy moments.” (US Weekly)
Rapper Kanye West is planning to move to London to study fashion. Kanye West has said he plans to move to London next year to pursue a career in fashion. “I’m going to go and take an internship and just do something that’s, like, completely normal and just rap at the weekends or something,” he told the Mirror before a friend added, “He’s applying at Louis Vuitton, Raf Simons and others. Everyone is surprised at just how seriously Kanye is taking his fashion dream. He is always in the front rows during the Paris and Milan fashion weeks, chatting away to the likes of Lily Allen. He absolutely loves London and wants to absorb the fashion over here.” (Handbag)
Hugh Hefner says he can’t wait to walk ex Kendra Wilkinson down the aisle at her wedding next June. “We’re going to have Kendra’s wedding and reception at the mansion — a spectacular affair!” he told Usmagazine.com over the weekend at the 55th anniversary Playmate celebration in West Hollywood. Wilkinson will officially move out the Playboy mansion next week, added Bridget Marquardt, who will serve as one of her bridesmaids (along with Holly Madison). She told Us she wants to assist Wilkinson in choosing a dress. “I’m just not home that much, but I’m trying to help her out as much as possible,” said Marquardt, who added that the ceremony will be filmed for their E! series. Now that they’re no longer living under the same roof, she said their bond has gotten tighter. “We text a lot,” Marquardt said. “It hasn’t quite hit me yet since I’m gone so much, but I feel like we’re just missing each other. All three of us have become even closer now. It’s weird.” Marquardt admitted that since Hef’s new girlfriends — 19-year-old twins Karissa and Kristina Shannon — moved in, “the feeling of the mansion is completely different. Not in a bad way, just totally different.” Did she give them any tips? “I was just talking to one of them, and she was telling me how much she cares about Hef, and I told her, ‘That’s great. If you meet somebody like that, take care of him. He’s a sweet guy.’” Marquardt said the split “is still hard” for Hef. “It goes both ways,” she said. “You know when it’s a breakup, and you meet somebody new, you feel kind of like it’s back and forth. “I know he doesn’t want my advice,” Marquardt told Us. “Hef and I have a really special relationship, and I’ll love him forever.” (US Weekly)
Australia star Nicole Kidman has claimed she isn’t vain. Hollywood star Nicole Kidman has insisted she is not vain. “I’m not enamored with youth. There isn’t wisdom in youth. I’m not particularly vain, I get ready in five minutes. I’m not always looking in the mirror but I like to be healthy. I want to be able to run and walk and hike,” Showbiz Spy quote the Oscar winner saying before she explains what she was like as a child. “I was always on the outside, on the periphery of things, maybe because I was so fair-skinned. I wanted to be the surfer chick, the sporty girl down on the beach, but I was the bookish girl. My mother would keep me inside and I’d read novels.” (Handbag)
Attention Upper East Siders: Gossip Girl star Leighton Meester is not engaged. The New York Post had reported that she and beau Sebastian Stan announced on their “secret” Facebook pages that they’re getting hitched. But Stan’s rep tells Usmagazine.com, “He is not engaged.” Another source tells Us that the supposed Facebook pages are fake. A wedding may not be far off for the couple, who met on the set of their CW hit show. In October, a source close to the actress told Us that Meester is “really in love” with Stan. Said the source, “I think this is the first time she really sees a future with someone.” (US Weekly)
Sharon Osbourne is under police investigation after allegedly scuffling with a contestant on her U.S. reality TV show Rock Of Love: Charm School. Megan Hauserman claims Osbourne assaulted her during a recording of the show’s reunion special on Saturday. Osbourne is said to have flipped when Hauserman insulted her by saying she is only famous because of her marriage to Black Sabbath singer Ozzy Osbourne. The rock matriarch allegedly ran across the stage, grabbed Hauserman by the hair, and scratched her. Website TMZ.com reports that the pair had to be pulled apart by security guards. Hauserman went to hospital the following afternoon and filed a report with the Los Angeles Police Department that night. Authorities have confirmed Osbourne is a suspect in a minor battery allegation but that no charges have been filed. (Teen Hollywood)
THE OTHER STUFF . . .
Several thousand dollars have rolled in for a deaf Michigan couple who feared they were going to lose the home whose renovation was viewed by millions on TV in 2004. Judy and Larry Vardon say the money should help them avoid foreclosure on the Oakland County home that was refurbished to better accommodate their blind, autistic son. The family was featured on “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.” The Macomb Daily and The Daily Tribune reported Sunday that the couple didn’t request money, but donations started coming after media outlets this month reported on their plight. The Vardons said they were weighed down by a mortgage payment that almost doubled since the makeover, and by medical insurance that hasn’t covered autism treatment for 16-year-old son Lance. (Daily Record)
A new music therapy room at a hospital on Florida’s Gulf Coast is being named for AC/DC lead singer Brian Johnson. Johnson and other rock stars have supported an effort to buy music equipment and provide music education for children, including those who are in the hospital. Music equipment and enhancements to the room at Sarasota Memorial Hospital are being donated by the John Entwhistle Foundation, named for the late bassist for the Who. Johnson and other rockers have worked to raise money for the charity. The man himself will be on hand at the hospital for the dedication of the Brian Johnson Music Therapy Room next week. (Daily Record)
Cameron Diaz says she’s a big fan of “Shrek the Musical” but has no desire to star in it. The actress, who voices Princess Fiona in the “Shrek” film franchise, raved about the musical adaptation of the animated blockbuster at its Broadway opening Sunday night. Asked whether she’d consider portraying Fiona on stage, she said: “No. Absolutely not. What they do up there … is, to me, impossible. It’s wonderful, though. They’ve done such a great job. They worked really hard, and it really pays off.” Tony-winning actress Sutton Foster plays Fiona in “Shrek the Musical,” which began preview performances last month at the Broadway Theatre. Actor Brian d’Arcy James portrays the titular smelly green ogre who lives in a swamp and falls for Fiona. “It’s hilarious,” said Diaz, sporting a white Bill Blass dress, black Dior coat and bright red lips. “There’s so many laughs. … It’s great to see all the actors playing it together, because when we do it for the animated (films), we never see each other. We don’t work together.” Diaz reprises her voice role in the fourth “Shrek” film, slated for release in 2010. Mike Myers and Eddie Murphy will return as Shrek and Donkey, respectively. Joining Diaz at Sunday’s performance were America Ferrera, Joan Rivers, Rosie Perez, Kathie Lee Gifford, Hoda Kotb, Phylicia Rashad, and Ben Stiller and his wife, actress Christine Taylor. “We are ‘Shrek’ fans at our house,” Stiller said while Taylor posed for photographs on the red carpet. “And we’re going to go check out the musical and let the kids know if it’s suitable for children.” Rivers bantered with Gifford and Kotb, who co-host the fourth hour of NBC’s “Today Show.” When Gifford asked for Rivers’ favorite “Shrek” character, Rivers responded: “Oh yeah, like I care! We’re all grown-ups! I’m thrilled to be here.” Rivers, who had a cameo in 2004’s “Shrek 2,” cracked: “I’m part of the family. But I’m not hardly, like, excited to see ‘Shrek’ (onstage).” (Daily Record)
It took a few years, but Tom Cruise says he regrets the tongue-lashing he gave Matt Lauer on NBC’s “Today” show the last time he was on. An apologetic Cruise returned to the morning program Monday to sit for his first interview with Lauer since criticizing Brooke Shields for taking anti-depressants in 2005. “It’s not what I had intended,” Cruise said. “In looking at myself, I thought, `man, that came across as arrogant.’ … That’s one of those things you go, OK, I could have absolutely handled that better.” That now-infamous conversation grew heated when the star told Lauer he was glib and didn’t know about psychiatry. Cruise, who has been a Scientologist for 25 years, agrees with the religion’s long-running campaign against psychiatry and the pharmaceutical industry. But in hindsight, “I thought I didn’t communicate it the way that I wanted to communicate it,” the 46-year-old actor says of defending his controversial views in the interview. “And that’s also – that’s not who I am. … That’s not the person that I am.” Lauer also took a moment to clear something up: He and Cruise remained friendly following their TV debate. “There was no animosity,” Lauer said. “As a matter of fact, at the end of the interview, we got up and shook hands and put our (arms) around each other.” In October, Cruise made a surprise cameo at a Friar’s Club roast of the “Today” show host. He joked that Lauer had given him some advice before his couch-jumping episode on Oprah Winfrey’s talk show: “Go crazy. Trust me. Trust me. People will love you for it.” Cruise is making the rounds on talk-shows to promote his new movie, “Valkyrie.” He stars as a would-be assassin of Adolf Hitler in “Valkyrie,” which is to be released Dec. 25. (Daily Record)
Bristol Palin is expecting her first child, a son, on Dec. 20 – and her grandfather says their family has been receiving support and gifts from all over the world. “In Sarah’s mailroom, there’s 87 boxes – big boxes of mail that haven’t even been opened,” Sarah Palin’s father, Chuck Heath, 70, tells the Web site Grandparents.com. “I’ve been answering letters all day, all week. We figure there’s over a hundred thousand pieces here.” After rocketing into the public consciousness after Palin’s vice-presidential bid, Heath says his family is still dealing with their newfound celebrity – and all the scrutiny that comes with such attention. “It completely changed everything here,” he says. “[We're] just a common, ordinary family. … All of a sudden [we] jumped into the mayhem.” Still, Heath says he and his family remain devoted to Palin’s political career. “We’re very supportive of our daughter and her family,” he says. “Anything she wants to do or undertake, we’re backing her.” Support from Sarah As for his granddaughter, Bristol, 18, becoming a mother, Heath says that she will have the full support of Sarah Palin, whom he characterizes as a hands-on mom. “My daughter will be a great grandmother,” he says. “She’s a great mother – great daughter, great mother. I don’t know about how much time she can spend, she’s so busy. But she’ll get her licks in. Don’t worry.” With the baby on the way, and the spotlight on his family in Alaska, Heath says he hopes Bristol’s son will be “a normal, happy, healthy kid.” And, he says, he and his wife plan to spend plenty of time with him. “My wife, Sally, is just looking forward to taking care of him,” he says. “She’s one of those good grandmother types. The grandkids and the kids come first. I come second.” (People)
When will young Hollywood learn their manners? At the Stand Up 2 Cancer event held at Kitson in LA on Wednesday, co-hosts Hilary Duff and Mandy Moore both demanded to “exit the rear entrance of the store,” according to one snitch. After their hosting duties, they wanted to sneak out to avoid any paparazzi, and “onlookers were shocked and appalled that they would try to leave early,” our spy said. Too bad for them, as they soon realized, Kitson doesn’t have a back entrance and they were forced to walk out the regular people’s en trance. (Page Six)
Earlier this year, the former Western Australia Premier, Alan Carpenter, announced that a new drama venue would be built and named in tribute to the late Aussie actor, Heath Ledger. Carpenter was even joined back then by Heath’s dad at the construction ceremony of the $87 million center and Kim Ledger told reporters his son would have been proud to have “his name” on it. However, that’s no longer the case. The new Premier, Colin Barnet, probably not a Ledger fan, has just announced that the naming has been overturned in favor of a more “diverse title.” Barnett confirmed the venue will now be called the State Theatre Centre of Western Australia. He did state that inside the new centre, the 575-seat theatre would still be named after Heath. Australia’s Culture and Arts Minister John Day added that “A great deal of consideration has been given to the name of the venue and this has involved consultation with the Ledger family, which is pleased Heath is being acknowledged in this way, and a range of stakeholders. The name, State Theatre Centre, strongly identifies the venue as a place of civic pride for all Western Australians and will be a venue where audiences can enjoy high-quality performing arts by local, national and international artists.” What do U think? Just like politicians, say one thing and do another! (Perez Hilton)
Opening her movie on Christmas, the same day her ex-husband’s film hits theaters, will be tough for Jennifer Aniston - but it would be much tougher promoting “Marley & Me” if Hollywood’s most talked-about single woman didn’t have a date. In interviews for her upcoming flicks (she’s also starring in “He’s Just Not That Into You”), Aniston, 39, has been open about dating John Mayer, 31. But we hear she was also scouting other candidates during a lull in their relationship. A few months ago, during a brief split between the duo, Aniston’s camp was shopping for potential dates. “She didn’t want to face the glare of being unattached while Brad Pitt toted Angelina Jolie around” on the promotional rounds for his release of “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.” Aniston “did not want to be single when her movie opened,” one source said. “A friend of her agent was calling around asking for young men whom they could set her up with.” But the attempt to find a replacement for Mayer was aborted when he and Aniston soon got back together. The publicity blitz for Aniston has been fierce. A Vogue interview in which she called Jolie “uncool” for revealing that she and Pitt fell in love on the set of “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” (while he and Aniston were still married) was followed by a nearly nude cover photo on GQ. She admits in GQ she was clueless about Mayer before they met, and stumbles over the title to his most famous song, “Your Body Is a Wonderland.” She said, “Honestly, I did not know much about him before I met him. I’d heard, you know, uh, ‘Your Body’ – that song. But what I can say is that I had no idea what an extraordinary musician he is.” Still, the two are trying to prove they are a for-real couple. At the LA premiere of “Marley & Me” the other night, Mayer told reporters, “I’m here to support my girl.” (Page Six)
It’s another year at the top of Condé Nast for Vogue. Industry sources told Page Six that Anna Wintour‘s style bible “was the most profitable magazine in the company this year” – a stat that’s based on overall earnings. Vogue held the spot last year as well, though one Condé snitch told us, “It would be really hard to determine that number.” The data aren’t publicly released, but we’re told Glamour had the title in 2006. (Page Six)
Heath Ledger’s former girlfriend Michelle Williams and father Kim are said to be at odds as to who should collect the award if the late actor wins a Golden Globe. Following Heath Ledger’s posthumous Golden Globe nomination former girlfriend Michelle Williams and father Kim are said to be battling over who will collect the award should the late actor win. “Kim desperately wants to do it,” a source told the New York Daily News. “But the studio and the producers would rather have Michelle receive it on behalf of Matilda – the couple’s daughter.” However a friend of the Ledgers isn’t so keen. “Why would Michelle be involved? She had nothing to do with the movie,” the friend says. “They weren’t even together when he passed away. Would you have your ex-wife accept your award? And they weren’t even married. Director Chris Nolan or star Christian Bale would make more sense. Michelle makes no sense. It’s like those rumors that she would go to the premiere of Dark Knight. That was never in the realm of possibility.” (Handbag)
Madonna’s spokeswoman says the singer has settled with ex-husband Guy Ritchie for at least 50 million pounds ($76 million). Liz Rosenberg told The Associated Press on Monday that Madonna has given Ritchie between 50 and 60 million pounds ($76 million to $92 million) as part of their divorce agreement. She says the figure includes the value of the couple’s country home Ashcombe in western England. She adds that while the financial component of the settlement has been worked out, custodial arrangements for the couple’s children have yet to be finalized. “I’d assume it’s one of the largest payouts ever in a divorce settlement,” Rosenberg said. A representative for Ritchie declined to comment. (Daily Record)
A man accused of leaking nine unreleased tracks from the Guns N’ Roses album “Chinese Democracy” has pleaded guilty to a federal copyright violation. Kevin Cogill entered the plea Monday morning in a Los Angeles courtroom. Prosecutors accused him of leaking the album online on his blog, months before Axl Rose’s long-delayed opus arrived on store shelves. A document shows they agreed to recommend probation in exchange for the plea deal. Cogill admitted he leaked nine of the 14 songs that appeared on the album, but has not publicly stated how he received the tracks. His plea agreement requires him to cooperate with investigators. According to his plea deal, Cogill could be sentenced to a year in federal prison, probation and a hefty fine. (Daily Record)
The actor accused in the shooting death of an off-duty policeman testified Monday that he didn’t know his alleged accomplice was armed when he went to an apartment looking for drugs. Taking the witness stand in his own defense at his murder trial in the Bronx, Lillo Brancato sought to fend off suggestions by the prosecution that his testimony – at times punctuated by vignettes about his drug-crazed downfall – was another acting job. “Is this a role you’re playing today?” his attorney Joseph Tacopina asked at the end of a daylong stint on the witness stand. “Absolutely not,” the 32-year-old defendant responded. Brancato – who got his big break playing opposite Robert De Niro in the 1993 film “A Bronx Tale” and also is known for playing a wannabe mobster on the HBO hit “The Sopranos” – is charged with second-degree murder in the December 2005 shooting death of Officer Daniel Enchautegui. Authorities say Armento and Brancato broke into the basement apartment to steal prescription drugs after a night of drinking at a strip club. Enchautegui, who lived next door, came out to investigate. Armento blasted the 28-year-old officer with his .357 Magnum, hitting him in the heart. The dying officer fired back, wounding both men. Armento was convicted earlier this year of first-degree murder. Brancato testified that there was a never a break-in. He claimed that he had known the owner, a Vietnam veteran, for several years. He also said he had permission to go inside and take painkillers and other pills whenever he felt like it, and didn’t know the man had died earlier that year. The pills were part of a drug problem that he said began when he was “introduced to marijuana” on the set of “A Bronx Tale.” He later became hooked on crack and heroin, he said. He told the jury that while suffering from judgment-impairing heroin withdrawals on the night of the shooting, he accidentally broke the kitchen window of the apartment in a desperate attempt to wake up his old pill-supplier. “I was becoming dope sick,” Brancato testified. “Mentally, I was a mess.” Brancato and Armento left momentarily to try to get drugs from a drug dealer. When that failed, they returned to the basement apartment and came face-to-face with the officer. “I heard someone say, `Don’t move,’” Brancato said. “I turned around quickly and I was shot twice.” Brancato said he ran away, not knowing he’d been shot by a police officer. When uniformed officers stopped him, he lifted up his shirt to show them he was wounded. “Please help me,” he said he told them. “I don’t want to die.” (Daily Record)
MUSIC . . .
Organizers say Aretha Franklin has given a holiday benefit concert for members of the military after missing a Times Square award presentation hours earlier. A spokesman for the concert organizers says the Queen of Soul went on as scheduled Sunday night at the Nokia Theatre, performing “New York, New York,” a medley of military tunes and her classic “Respect.” It’s unclear why Franklin didn’t show up to receive the Torch of Freedom Award earlier Sunday in Times Square. Messages left with her publicist were not immediately returned. The award was given by the Soldiers’, Sailors’, Marines’, Coast Guard and Airmen’s Club. The evening concert was sponsored by the club and NewYork.com, an online compendium of entertainment and tourist information. (Daily Record)
Hip-Hop mogul Jay-Z spends so much time at his recording studio, he needs to keep a bed in there. Sources told us Hova hit up BoConcept on Madison Avenue and 30th Street to find furniture for his Manhattan “office.” We hear his purchases included a sleep-sized sofa, a bar table, bar stools and a glass coffee table, and that he dispatched his assistant to collect the goods. No word as to whether Beyoncé had any say in the decorating decisions. (Page Six)
Will Simon Rex (a k a “Dirt Nasty”) go the route of Chris “Ludacris“ Bridges? Bridges went from rapper to acclaimed actor after starring in “Crash” in 2004, and now Rex has “landed a serious role” in the film “King of the Avenue,” a source said. In the flick, which also stars Esai Morales, Rex plays the adopted drug-dealing son of Ving Rhames. We’re told the whole crew is now filming in Puerto Rico. (Page Six)
Metallica has finally confirmed “the worst-kept secret in rock’n'roll” and unveiled details of the upcoming “Guitar Hero” game devoted to the band. According to Metallica’s Web site, the game “allows you to play as us in either single instrument or band career game modes” and will likely be released in the first half of next year. Adding to the atmosphere will be famous setting associated with the band’s career, including Moscow’s Tushino Airfield, the site of the 1991 Monsters of Rock concert, and “new venues with in-the-round staging.” There will be 28 Metallica songs in all, although the full list has not yet been announced. Songs from Alice In Chains, Foo Fighters, Slayer, Machine Head and Queen can also be played. Lastly, in a feature sure to thrill Lars Ulrich devotees, “Guitar Hero: Metallica” will boast an “expert” difficulty level that employs two bass drum kick pedals. The Metallica edition follows an Aerosmith-dedicated “Guitar Hero,” which was released in June. Meanwhile, Pearl Jam will jump into “Rock Band” in a big way on March 24, the same date its 1991 debut album, “Ten,” will be reissued in expanded form by Epic/Legacy. The entire album will be available for download through “Rock Band”; the “Ten” track “Alive was previously released on the “Rock Band 2″ game disc. (Billboard)
Some of the biggest names in independent music have banded together to record exclusive songs for “Dark Is the Night,” a double-disc album whose proceeds will benefit the Red Hot organization’s work with AIDS research. In the works since 2006, the project is due Feb. 17 from Beggars Banquet and, as previously reported, was curated by the National’s Aaron and Bryce Dessner. The lineup includes Spoon, the Arcade Fire, Yo La Tengo, the New Pornographers, Bon Iver, Feist, Cat Power, My Morning Jacket and Iron & Wine, among many others. “I’ve been listening to some of these bands since I was in high school. Now they’re peers of ours but sometimes you can’t even believe that — these are people I’ve idolized and respected,” Aaron Dessner tells Billboard.com. The National contributed the song “So Far Around the Bend,” which Dessner says the band “didn’t feel would make sense” on one of its own albums. “It has this pretty crazy orchestral arrangement; it’s a little bit of a throwback song.” “Dark Is the Night” is also packed with intriguing collaborations, including Feist with Ben Gibbard and Grizzly Bear, Dirty Projectors with David Byrne, the Books with Jose Gonzalez, Aaron Dessner with Bon Iver and Bryce Dessner with Antony. Some of the biggest names in independent music have banded together to record exclusive songs for “Dark Is the Night,” a double-disc album whose proceeds will benefit the Red Hot organization’s work with AIDS research. In the works since 2006, the project is due Feb. 17 from Beggars Banquet and, as previously reported, was curated by the National’s Aaron and Bryce Dessner. The lineup includes Spoon, the Arcade Fire, Yo La Tengo, the New Pornographers, Bon Iver, Feist, Cat Power, My Morning Jacket and Iron & Wine, among many others. “I’ve been listening to some of these bands since I was in high school. Now they’re peers of ours but sometimes you can’t even believe that — these are people I’ve idolized and respected,” Aaron Dessner tells Billboard.com. The National contributed the song “So Far Around the Bend,” which Dessner says the band “didn’t feel would make sense” on one of its own albums. “It has this pretty crazy orchestral arrangement; it’s a little bit of a throwback song.” “Dark Is the Night” is also packed with intriguing collaborations, including Feist with Ben Gibbard and Grizzly Bear, Dirty Projectors with David Byrne, the Books with Jose Gonzalez, Aaron Dessner with Bon Iver and Bryce Dessner with Antony. (Billboard)
MOVIE . . .
Will Smith has sequel fever. The box-office magnet is in talks to finalize follow-ups to both “Hancock” and “I Am Legend.” A Hollywood insider said, “He is ready to do both. Producers are just trying to get Charlize Theron to sign on for the ‘Hancock’ sequel.” As for “I Am Legend,” it will be more of a prequel as Smith’s character died at the end of the zombies-take-Manhattan movie. “It will be about how the disease spreads and the fall of the last great American city. It will also develop the relationship between Will’s character and his wife.” A rep for Smith said, “There have been talks about both of these projects.” (Page Six)
What does Twilight star Peter Facinelli think about director Catherine Hardwicke not returning for the vampire sequels? “Well, of course, you’re bummed,” he told Usmagazine.com over the weekend at the Z100 Jingle Ball 2008 concert in NYC. “Catherine hired me for the movie, and I had a great time with her, and I would have loved her to do the second one. “Unfortunately, it’s not up to me,” he went on. “I don’t know her deal. I know they’ll keep the tone she set. And I also know that in franchise movies, like Harry Potter, [they use different directors].” Over the weekend, it was announced that American Pie director Chris Weitz will be directing the Twilight sequel New Moon. “I am very pleased to announce that he’s agreed to be a part of our Twilight world,” Twlight author Stephenie Meyer said on her Web site. “I’ve had the chance to talk to Chris, and I can tell you that he is excited by the story and eager to keep the movie as close to the book as possible. He is also very aware of you, the fans, and wants to keep you all extremely happy. “I’m excited to work with Chris,” she continued. “I think he brings a lot to the table, not the least of which for me is that he wrote the screenplay for and directed one of my favorite movies of all time, About a Boy. I’m really looking forward to seeing his vision for New Moon.” (Us Weekly)
Fox’s remake of the sci-fi classic “The Day the Earth Stood Still” survived critics’ toxic attacks in weekend-winning style, as the Keanu Reeves starrer landed atop the domestic boxoffice with an estimated $31 million in opening grosses. Overture’s urban laugher “Nothing Like the Holidays” debuted much more modestly, with $3.5 million in seventh place. And Freestyle’s animated adventure “Delgo” never got started, debuting with just $916,000. Warner Bros.’ comedy “Four Christmases” nabbed second place over its third outing with $13.3 million and an $88 million cume. Summit’s vampire romance “Twilight” finished third over its fourth frame with an $8 million performance and a $150.1 million cume. Two wide releases tumbled from the top 10 during their second weekends. Sony’s Chess Records musical “Cadillac Records” fell 54% to $1.6 million for a 10-day cume of $5.9 million, while Lionsgate’s action sequel “Punisher: War Zone” slid a big 68% to $1.7 million with a $7 million cume. Industrywide, the weekend’s $93 million in collective grosses marked a 42% decline from the same frame last year, according to Nielsen EDI. But year to date, 2008 is still outpacing the same portion of last year by 1%, at $9.01 billion. Additional cast on the “Day” remake — directed by Scott Derrickson (“The Exorcism of Emily Rose”) — includes Jennifer Connelly and Jon Hamm (AMC’s “Mad Men”). Many critics judged the film harshly as measured against Robert Wise’s 1951 original, but Fox execs said the PG-13 “Day” opened better than they had anticipated. “With the holiday playtime coming up, we’re going to have a great and profitable run,” Fox senior VP distribution Chris Aronson said. “Day” also registered $39 from 90 foreign territories for a worldwide gross of $70 million. Its domestic haul included $3.8 million from Imax giant-screen venues. Produced for an estimated $80 million, “Day” attracted audiences skewing 55% male, with 51% of patrons under 25. Rated PG-13, “Holidays” played best with major-market urban audiences, but its modestly wide 1,671 playdates reflected limited traction with other demos. Helmed by Alfredo De Villa (“Washington Heights”), its ensemble cast includes Alfred Molina, Freddy Rodriguez, John Leguizamo, Debra Messing and Luis Guzman. “We wish it had done better,” Overture distribution topper Kyle Davies said. “But we’re hoping it finds its footing as a Christmas perennial.” Voice cast for “Delgo” includes Freddy Prinze Jr. in the title role. Freestyle execs acknowledged disappointment in the film’s limp bow. “This film deserved better but failed to find its target, despite a significant television advertising blitz,” Freestyle co-topper Mark Borde said. Looking ahead, the pre-Christmas frame features three wide openers: Sony’s Will Smith starrer “Seven Pounds,” Warners’ Jim Carrey-toplined “Yes Man” and Universal’s animated family feature “The Tale of Despereaux.” (Hollywood Reporter)
Slumdog Millionaire” was named best motion picture drama and “Happy-Go-Lucky” was named best motion picture comedy or musical at the 13th annual Satellite Awards, presented Sunday at the InterContinental Hotel in Century City. The awards, voted by the International Press Academy, also chose “Slumdog’s” Danny Boyle as best director and the film’s composer A.R. Rahman for his score. “Happy-Go-Lucky’s” Sally Hawkins was hailed as best actress in a comedy or musical. The group gave its dramatic acting awards to Angelina Jolie for “Changeling” and Richard Jenkins for “The Visitor.” Ricky Gervais was chosen best actor in a comedy or musical for “Ghost Town.” Supporting acting nods for film went to Rosemarie Dewitt for “Rachel Getting Married” and Michael Shannon for “Revolutionary Road.” A complete list of winners is available on the next page. (Hollywood Reporter)
Guy Nattiv and Erez Tadmor are pulling back the curtain on a piece of Mossad history, writing an untitled project centering on the Israeli intelligence agency for “La Vie en Rose” producer Alain Goldman. The duo also might direct. The film will follow the true story of the investigation into the disappearance of a 9-year-old boy from the streets of Jerusalem in the early 1960s. The case, known as the Yossele Case, took on major importance in Israel — still in its nascent stages as a country — which was making its mission to be seen as a country that would provide a safe haven for Jews throughout the world. The police proved to be ineffectual, and the prime minister called on the Mossad to step in. Goldman is hoping to move fast on the project, with a spring shoot being eyed. “It’s a Mossad story and will be entertaining, but it asks the very deep question: Is Israel a state that can’t protect its children?” said Goldman, principal of Legende. “It’s the opposite of ‘Munich’: It’s the rare occasion that Mossad is called for something that does not involve killing.” He added: “I like directors who have something to say, and these guys are saying something deep. And this is the kind of movie I am moved by and as a producer want to put my money in.” Nattiv and Tadmor, repped by Principato Young, wrote and directed “Strangers,” an Israeli film that played the festival circuit, garnering a nomination for a Grand Jury Prize in Sundance’s world cinema category. (Hollywood Reporter)
Fans of the skintight purple suit rejoice: the Phantom is back. An Australian production company on Monday announced it had secured the rights to “The Phantom Legacy,” a follow-up to the 1996 film, “The Phantom,” which starred Billy Zane as the masked hero who fights evil from his jungle headquarters. The latest adaptation, which is expected to cost $87 million, will focus on “the Father/Son relationship, and what it means to be The Phantom,” scriptwriter Tim Boyle said in a statement. “The film will be set in the present day and will deal with the concept of destiny.” Producer Bruce Sherlock, who also served as executive producer of the first Phantom movie, said the new film will be a marked improvement over its predecessor, which received mixed reviews. “It has the makings of a blockbuster,” Sherlock told The Associated Press. “There’s some surprises that will thrill the Phantom fans worldwide.” Sherlock’s Sydney-based Sherlock Symington Productions won the rights to the film. The movie will likely be shot entirely in Australia, with production set to begin within six to nine months, Sherlock said. Producers are in talks with several “top talent” Australian and American actors, Sherlock said. He declined to provide names. The Phantom began as a daily newspaper comic strip by Lee Falk in 1936. The protagonist – alter ego Kit Walker – is the 21st in a family of men who have passed the task of fighting injustice onto their sons. The first Phantom took the job to avenge his father’s death at the hands of pirates. (Daily Record)
TV . . .
Bow-tied schoolteacher Bob Crowley beat “Survivor” rivals Sugar and Susie to emerge as Sole Survivor on Sunday’s season finale. At age 57 the oldest winner in “Survivor” history, Crowley will take his $1 million prize back home to Portland, Maine. Bearded, wiry and professorial-looking, he teaches high school physics in nearby Gorham. “My plan was to fly under the radar as long as I could … and be a nice guy, so that people would like me,” Crowley summed up shortly after his name was announced by host Jeff Probst, on a post-game special aired live from Hollywood. Runners-up were Susie Smith, the gabby 47-year-old hairdresser-homemaker from Charles City, Iowa, and 29-year-old Jessica “Sugar” Kiper, the blond pinup model from Brooklyn. The winner was chosen by a seven-member jury of previously expelled contestants, to whom the three finalists appealed during their all-important last tribal council. In that voting, Bob edged out Susie, 4 votes to 3, with Sugar snagging no one’s support. “I had to lie – and that’s part of the game – several times,” Sugar acknowledged while pleading her case between giggles. “And I’m sorry.” Sent packing earlier in the finale were Kenny Hoang, a 22-year-old professional video gamer from Westminster, Calif., and Matty Whitmore, a 29-year-old personal trainer from Pacific Palisades, Calif. This, the 17th edition of the CBS strategy-endurance game, was set in the West African nation of Gabon, where 18 castaways had come together when the season began. (Daily Record)
Changes are coming to “American Idol” when it returns in January, including “wild card” finalists picked by the show’s judges and less airtime for memorably bad auditions. Fox’s hit talent contest will open its eighth season with a two-night, four-hour premiere on Jan. 13-14 from 8-10 p.m. EST, the network said Monday. “American Idol” will cut the number of weeks featuring nationwide tryouts from four weeks to three and will bring more contestants to Hollywood to compete, 36 people versus the two dozen of past seasons, Fox says. (Daily Record)
It’s no joke: Amy Poehler officially left Saturday Night Live over the weekend. “This is my last show,” Poehler announced from her “Weekend Update” anchor desk. “Being able to do over 140 shows with my friends and my family has been a dream come true. “I love you,” she told the audience, “and I will miss all of you very much.” She won’t be off the small screen for long. The star — who welcomed son Archiewith husband Will Arnett in October — has signed on for NBC’s upcoming Office spin-off, set to air next year. In September, Poehler — who scored laughs as Hillary Clinton and Katie Couric on SNL this season — first announced plans to leave SNL. “It’s gonna be really hard — Boyz II Men hard — to say goodbye to yesterday,” she said at the time. “SNL was dangerous, late-night, last-minute and star-studded, but like any good drug, you need to know when to put it down.” (US Weekly)
Jennifer Love Hewitt is beefing up her production company. The “Ghost Whisperer” star-producer has tapped veteran TV movie producer Scott W. Anderson as producing partner at her Fedora Films, formerly LoveSpell Prods. The two met while working together on the Oxygen telefilm “Confessions of a Sociopathic Social Climber.” The company, newly housed in a bungalow on the Universal lot, has a pod deal at ABC Studios, which produces “Ghost Whisperer” for CBS. Fedora’s development slate includes the untitled Odessa project, an original movie for Lifetime, to which Hewitt is attached to star. In 2005, LoveSpell acquired the rights to “She Had Brains, a Body, and the Ability to Make Men Love Her,” a Texas Monthly article about a 22-year-old housewife and former homecoming queen in Odessa who became one of the city’s most popular hookers. The project originally was developed as a feature. On the feature side, Fedora is developing with Darius Films “Eboneezer Goodbye,” an indie written by Ross McCall. Additionally, Fedora has set up “Jennifer Love Hewitt’s The Music Box,” a 10-book graphic novel with IDW Comics, to be written by Scott Lobdell from a concept by Hewitt. Hewitt also has a signed a deal to pen a book for Hyperion. Anderson most recently was an executive producer at Stanley M. Brooks’ Once Upon a Time Films, where he supervised more than 50 hours of longform cable and television programming. Hewitt is repped by Endeavor, Untitled and attorney Bob Wallerstein. (Hollywood Reporter)
Robert Carlyle has been tapped as the lead in Sci Fi Channel’s new series “Stargate Universe.” “SGU,” the third installment in the cable channel’s “Stargate” franchise, hails from “Stargate SG-1″ and “Stargate Atlantis” co-creators Brad Wright and Robert Cooper, who will write and executive produce the new series. Sci Fi Channel is expected to give the MGM TV-produced “SGU” a 20-episode order. Production on the series is slated to begin in February in Vancouver. It is targeted to launch in the summer with a two-hour premiere. Described as edgier, darker and younger-skewing than its predecessors, “SGU” follows a group of soldiers, scientists and civilians left to fend for themselves when forced through a Stargate after their hidden base comes under attack. The survivors, who emerge aboard an ancient ship missing in the far reaches of space, are led by Dr. David Rush (Carlyle), who works to unlock the ship’s mysteries and return the group home but also might have ulterior motives. The network had said it was looking to cast a well-known actor as Rush and fresh faces to play the rest of the ship’s crew. “Robert Carlyle brings a depth, intelligence and complexity to his roles, which will fit perfectly with the fresh, new reinvention of this franchise,” Sci Fi original-programming chief Mark Stern said. Scotland-born Carlyle, best known for his roles in “Trainspotting” and “The Full Monty,” recently starred opposite Kiefer Sutherland in Fox’s “24: Redemption.” He is repped by Gersh, manager Jon Rubinstein and the U.K.’s Christian Hodell. (Hollywood Reporter)
TODAY’S IMPOSSIBLE QUESTION . . . (Internet)
Q. A survey says that 35% of us do it in the kitchen or dining room while 27% do it in the bedroom. What is it?
A. Wrap Christmas presents
TODAY’S QUOTE (By Neil Kendall)
“SOME PEOPLE FOLLOW THEIR DREAMS, OTHERS HUNT THEM DOWN AND BEAT THEM MERCILESSLY INTO SUBMISSION.”
MIND BOGGLERS . . . (QuickTrivia)
Q. What is the name of the dog from the Grinch Who Stole Christmas?
A. Max ****
B. Rover
C. Sport
D. Spot
Q. In the world of music, Budapest, Julliard, and Cleveland are all prominent?
A. Music schools
B. String Quartets **** (A traditional string quartet is composed of two violins, a viola, and a cello)
C. Symphony orchestras
D. Opera houses
Q. Including TV versions, which of these people has played both Batman and Simon Templar (aka The Saint)?
A. Roger Moore
B. Val Kilmer ****
C. Adam West
D. George Clooney
Q. What Norwegian actress, known for roles in Ingmar Bergman movies, was actually born in Tokyo?
A. Liv Ullmann ****
B. Greta Garbo
C. Uma Thurman
D. Ingrid Bergman
Q. Geena Davis is an Oscar winner and a Mensa member, and in 1999 she tried out for Olympic’s in which sport?
A. Equestrian
B. Archery ****
C. Diving
D. Fencing
Q. Nominated for an Oscar, in what language did Roman Polanski make “Noz w wodzie” (“Knife in the Water”), his full-length directorial debut?
A. Hungarian
B. Russian
C. Czech
D. Polish ****
TRAVEL TIPS . . . (Peter Greenberg Worldwide)
GOURMET AIRLINE FOOD FOR SALE:
Many airlines are upping the standards of their coach cuisine, but you may just have to pay for it. Gourmet in-flight meals traditionally were meant for first- and business-class travelers. Now, Delta Airlines has partnered with celebrity chef Todd English to design meals for its coach customers. The menu items are available for purchase, ranging from 2 to 10 dollars and include a smoked salmon and egg salad croissant. Midwest Airlines joined forces with Chef Shawn Monroe to create its Best Care Cuisine, which is available for from 5.50 to 10 dollars. However, the airline does offer a complimentary treat: fresh, bake-onboard chocolate chip cookies served warm. Hawaiian Air has gone a step further and offers gourmet meals to its coach customers free of extra charge. The meals, chosen by Chef Beverly Gannon, include Chicken Strips with Cacciatore Sauce and Asian-inspired salads.
(Peter Greenberg is North America’s preeminent expert on Travel. An Emmy Award-Winning writer and producer, Peter is the Travel Editor for NBC’S “TODAY SHOW,” MSNBC and CNBC. A Best-Selling author of the “Travel Detective” series and host of the nationally syndicated “Peter Greenberg Worldwide Radio Show.” Visit WWW.PETERGREENBERGWORLDWIDE.COM to learn more about Peter Greenberg and his adventures.)
MIKE BUTTS CREATIVE . . .
IF I DIDN’T HAVE PETS:
WHEN THE DOORBELL RANG IT WOULDN’T SOUND LIKE A KENNEL!
I COULD LAY IN BED SPRAWLED OUT ANYWAY I WANTED AND WOULDN’T HAVE TO LEAVE SPACE FOR FURRY-SMALLER BODIES SNUGGLING WITH ME—
I’D HAVE MORE MONEY—AND WOULDN’T FEEL GUILTY WHEN I WENT ON VACATION—I’D HAVE MONEY FOR A VACATION!
I WOULDN’T HAVE TO SPELL OUT WORDS LIKE O-U-T-S-I-D-E, C-A-R—W-A-L-K- M-I-L-K-B-O-N-E-J
I WOULDN’T BE PUTTING MY VETS KIDS THROUGH COLLEGE!
AND I’D NEVER HAVE TO ANSWER THE QUESTION, WHY DO YOU HAVE ANIMALS—FROM PEOPLE WHO WILL NEVER KNOW THE JOY OF BEING LOVED
UNCONDITIONALLY BY SOMEONE AS CLOSE TO AN ANGEL AS THEY WILL EVER GET.
IF I DIDN’T HAVE PETS—MY LIFE WOULD BE EMPTIER!!!
DOGGIE DOWNERS DIDN’T WORK:
WE ADOPTED NIKKI FROM THE KENT COUNTY SPCA—I DON’T KNOW WHAT HER PREVIOUS OWNERS DID TO HER BEFORE THEY TURNED HER IN—BUT
SHE WILL NOT ALLOW US TO TRIM HER TOE-NAILS.WE TRIED THE REGULAR WAY—THEN WITH A MUZZLE AND SHE IS TRAUMATIZED AND GOES WILD
AND SCREAMS BLOODY MURDER.
YESTERDAY WE TOOK THE VETS ADVISE AND TRIED TO GIVE HER A SEDATIVE–STARTING OUT WITH A ¼ PILL—NO CHANGE—ANOTHER ¼ PILL..
NOTHING—AND ANOTHER ¼ PILL—STILL NOT SETTLING DOWN..FINALLY THE 4TH QUARTER– A FULL PILL.. NADA—NOTHING—STILL NOT
MELLOWING OUT. NEXT TIME I’LL TAKE THE PILLS AND SEE IF THAT HELPS!!
BIRTHDAYS . . .
—1770 Composer Ludwig Van Beethoven (d. 3-26-1827)
—1775 Novelist Jane Austen (Pride and Predjudice) (d. 7-18-1817)
—1863 Philosopher/Author George Santayana (d. 9-26-1952)
—1899 Playwright Noel Coward (d. 1973)
—1901 Anthropologist/Author Margaret Mead (d. 11-5-1978)
—1939 Actress Liv Ullmann (Scenes from a Marriage)
—1941 Journalist Lesley Stahl (Face the Nation)
—1943 Producer Stephen Bochco (NYPD Blue)
—1943 Tony Hicks - guitarist for The Hollies (“Long Cool Woman”)
—1945 Musician Anthony Hicks (The Hollies)
—1946 Musician Benny Andersson (ABBA) (“Mamma Mia”)
—1948 Actor Ben Cross (Chariots of Fire)
—1949 Musician Billy Gibbons (ZZ Top) (“Sleeping Bag”)
—1951 Baseball’s Mike Flanagan
—1959 Actress Alison La Placa (The John Laroquette Show)
¾1961 Actor Jon Tenney (Fools Rush In)
—1962 Football’s William “The Refrigerator” Perry
¾1963 Actor Benjamin Bratt (Law & Order)
—1966 Basketball’s Clifton Ralph Robinson
—1971 Musician Michael McCary (Boyz II Men “I’ll Make Love to You”)
¾1988 Actress Anna Popplewell (The Little Vampire)
THIS DAY IN HISTORY . . .
—1770 Beethoven’s Birthday–a holiday in Michigan–honoring the great composer (some say the greatest of all time) who was born on this day in Bonn, Germany (d. 3-26-1827). “Louis, from the beet garden,” as his name means, began losing his hearing early in life. By the time he conducted the debut of his Ninth Symphony (as the old joke goes), he was *sooo* deaf, he thought it was his Eighth!
—1773 A group calling itself “The Sons Of Liberty,” many dressed up in Indian blankets, boarded three British ships in Boston Harbor during the night and dumped 342 chests of tea overboard in protest against the new “tea tax.”
—1905 Variety, the show business weekly, was first published.
—1938 The movie, “A Christmas Carol” was released in USA.
—1951 “Dragnet” starring Jack Webb as Sgt. Joe Friday, debuted on NBC.
—1966 Jimi Hendrix releases his first single “Hey Joe.”
—1967 Pink Floyd play their first show at an “underground” club in London.
—1971 Don McLean’s “American Pie” is released.
—1972 Joan Baez arrives in Hanoi, North Vietnam, on a peace mission just as US fighters begin bombing the city.
—1972 The Miami Dolphins, led by Larry Csonka and Bob Griese, and a great defense, became the first NFL team to go undefeated and untied in 14 regular season games by beating the Baltimore Colts 16-0. They went on to win the Super Bowl to complete a 17-0 season.
—1973 O.J. Simpson of the Buffalo Bills rushes for 200 yards in a 34-14 victory over the New York Jets and sets an NFL record with 2,003 yards rushing for the season and the first to break the 2,000 yard barrier.
—1975 “One Day at a Time” TV comedy, debut on CBS, which introduced America to a divorced mother (Bonnie Franklin) raising two teenage daughters.
—1977 “Saturday Night Fever” starring John Travolta opened nationwide in movie theaters. (It had opened days before in New York).
—1978 After being displaced for a week by Chic’s “Le Freak”, Barbra Streisand & Neil Diamond return to the top spot on the US singles chart with “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers.”
—1983 The Who announce they are breaking up.
—1985 An LA survey of record company executives finds that the most desired signee is Bruce Springsteen, followed by Prince, Michael Jackson, Lionel Richie, and U2. Stevie Wonder places tenth, Madonna is #20.
—1987 Madonna (b. 8-16-1958) filed for divorce from actor Sean Penn (b. 8-17-1960).
—1988 Disco star Sylvester dies of AIDS at age 42.
—1988 “Rain Man” starring Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise opened in theaters.
—1991 A U.S. District Judge in Settle declines to stop future productions of “Janis” a two-act play based on the life of singer Janis Joplin. Lawyers for her estate had claimed exclusive rights to Joplin’s “voice, delivery, mannerisms, appearance and dress.”
—1996 A budget impasse led to the second shutdown of the federal government.
¾1997 Singer Nicolette Larson (“Lotta Love”) died from a brain ailment. She was 45 years old. Nicolette was born on 7-17-1952. She was married to Rusell at her time of death and had a daughter Elise May.
RADIO ONLINE® DAILY SHOW PREP™ . . .
ON THIS DAY
The Boston Tea Party took place way, way back in 1773. A group of men calling themselves the “Sons of Liberty” and dressed as Mohawk Indians went to the Boston Harbor. They boarded three British ships, the Beaver, the Eleanor and the Dartmouth, and dumped 45 tons of tea into the Boston Harbor.
· Little did the British know what was brewing.
· After it took way too much sugar to sweeten it, they stuck to a “cup at a time” after that.
Trivia: A study by researchers in Taiwan found that people who drank tea once a week for 10 years or more had 20 percent less body fat than those who didn’t. The tea drinkers had 2 percent less abdominal fat, a special type of fat that is a known risk factor for heart disease and other illnesses. Researchers believe that tea works by boosting metabolism and reducing the body’s ability to absorb fat-producing calories.
Bit: Have your own tea party and offer a cash prize to the first listener who will drink a packet of ice tea mix! That’s right, they have to drink (actually eat) the entire packet of iced tea mix to win the prize. You might want to have some water standing by for afterwards.
On this date in 1811, Missouri suffered an earthquake that was equivalent to 12.0 on the Richter scale. Needless to say, no one had to stir paint for a week.
TODAY IS
Former NFL player William “The Refrigerator” Perry turns 46 today. He’s still running, he just makes a lot more noise these days. And his warranty expired a long time ago. Actor Benjamin Bratt turns 45 today. To think at one time he was this close to becoming Mr. Julia Roberts.
“60 Minutes” star Leslie Stahl has seven more years than minutes. (She turns 67 today.)
National Chocolate Covered Anything Day — Chocolate is good for the heart. A recent study reveals that dark chocolate increases the flexibility of the lining of the blood vessels, helping to open them, thereby promoting blood flow. The overall effect helps prevent hardening of the arteries and heart attacks. However, the study at Greece’s Athens Medical School found that only dark chocolate containing 74 percent cocoa had the effect. Dark chocolate also contains antioxidants that protect blood vessels from other kinds of danger.
Stupid Toy Day — Have listeners call in a nominate their “stupid toys.” Or you could has listeners help each other out in finding those hard to find “stupid” toys. We’ve had some pretty good calls. Lots of them too! The listeners are being really depictive in describing their frustration and telling of their encounters in the crowded stores.
THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW
· Madonna has settled her divorce with ex-husband Guy Ritchie with at least 50 million pounds ($76 million).
· Olympic gold medallists Michael Phelps and Nastia Liukin guest star in the final holiday “Barney Cam” Christmas greeting from the White House.
· Children who are born four months before the height of cold and flu season have a greater risk of developing childhood asthma than children born at any other time of the year, according to researchers from Vanderbilt University in Nashville.
· A self-proclaimed prophet in Utah says that a disaster will prevent Barack Obama from becoming president.
· Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber welcomed their second son into the world over the weekend.
· Tara Reid has checked herself into a rehab center. Really?
· In case you missed it, Van Johnson has died. He was 92.
· Gossip lead singer Beth Ditto has dyed her hair orange and shaved off her eyebrows. Just another day at the office.
· A “Star Wars” fan dished out $240,000 at an auction for the light saber that Mark Hamill waved around in the first two “Star Wars” movies.
· Hugh Jackman will host the next round of the Academy Awards.
· The Mariah Carey pregnancy rumor is making the rounds again.
· Last Friday, Charlie Crist became the first Florida governor in 42 years to get married while in office.
· Gobbling down your meals quickly and continuing to eat until you are full may be enough to nearly triple your risk of being overweight, reports HealthDay News of research from Japan’s Osaka University.
· Plans are to give you an uninterrupted season 5 of “Lost” starting next month… unless a Screen Actors Guild strike gets in the way.
CONVERSATION STARTERS
(“TV Guide) Nielsen Media Research found soap opera ratings are on the decline, big time. Here’s the ratings in millions compared to 10 years ago:
· “All My Children” in 1998 4.2 million viewers, this year 2.5 million
· “As the World Turns” in 1998 4.6 million viewers, this year 2.6 million
· “The Bold and the Beautiful” in 1998 5.3 million viewers, this year 3.5 million
· “Days of Our Lives” in 1998 5.4 million viewers, this year 2.6 million
· “General Hospital” in 1998 4.5 million viewers, this year 2.8 million
· “Guiding Light” in 1998 4.5 million viewers, this year 2.1 million
· “One Life to Live” in 1998 3.6 million viewers, this year 2.6 million
· “The Young and the Restless” in 1998 7.9 million viewers, this year 4.9 million
Get this — according to Brown University, dermatologists have reported an increase in the number of cases of contact dermatitis, and that statistic has been traced to the growing popularity of cell phones. It’s not the phone itself that causes the allergic reaction, but the nickel it contains. Nickel is one of the most potent allergens in the world, and it can produce reactions ranging from mild redness to rashes and even painful and disfiguring blisters. A survey has revealed that approximately 50% of all cell phones now in use contain some level of nickel. Reactions are more common when the paint on the cell phone is chipped. (Sun)
If you’re partial to people watching on your ride to work, you may want to find another pastime. Passengers who keep busy with a book or puzzle feel less aggravated than those who rely on others for entertainment, early results from a study at Nottingham Trent University in England indicate. (Self) “If you hit this sign, you will hit that bridge” was named the funniest road sign in America in Hagerty Insurance’s second annual “Road Sign Rally.” Nearly 250 photos were submitted of not only road signs, but also local business signs and homegrown signs. Here’s a list of the top 10 funniest:
1. “If you hit this sign, you will hit this bridge”
2. “Extreme Fire Hazard: Don’t even fart in the forest”
3. “Arm, Leg, First Born”
4. “Attention dog guardians: Pick up after your dogs. Attention dogs: Grrr, bark, woof. Good dog.”
5. “Hell Freezes over” (frozen “Hell” sign)
6. “Eat here, get gas & worms”
7. “Guns, wedding gowns and cold beer”
8. “Caution Pedestrians Slippery When Wet”
9. “Drive slow, see our village: Drive fast, see our judge”
10. “Drop your pants here” (sign for a laundry mat)
According to a recent Lifetime Women’s Pulse Poll, 60% of women think of themselves as desperate housewives with 20% admitting they have a secret they wouldn’t want their neighbors to know. Some 16% admit they’d have an affair with their neighbor’s partner.
Turns out just saying “hello” may suffice to get a man going. A study in the journal Psychology of Women Quarterly found that men are more likely than women to interpret ambiguous or friendly behavior as a come on. Researchers asked 43 opposite sex pairs of strangers to have a 5 minute conversation, then fill out a questionnaire rating their partner’s physical attractiveness and personality. If a man found a woman attractive, he was more likely to think she was flirting, regardless of her intentions. Women, however, rated their partners as significantly less flirtatious, regardless of how attractive they found them. (Women’s Health)
40% admit they would run out of cash if they were unemployed for three months. 66% say they do not have enough cash to cover a year of unemployment.
PHONE TOPICS
· So what makes the perfect Christmas tree? Who doesn’t have theirs yet?
· What part of the Christmas tradition could you do without?
· Did you ever dress as a mascot? Which one?
· What’s the deadliest creature you’ve ever been next to?
· What’s the strangest thing someone has thrown at you?
· Who absolutely loves their job?
· Which Christmas special do you watch over, and over, and over again?
· What’s at the top of your “to do” list today? Everybody’s got something.
· Ever appear on stage with someone famous?
· Anyone listening ever have a child try to blackmail them? What do you do?
· What’s the funniest sitcom of all time? Best TV dram of all time?
· What do you depend on to tell you about the day? Horoscopes?
· Does anyone read the comics anymore? Which ones?
· We need a new road or freeway that runs from ____ to _____!
· What’s the one gift you don’t want to get this year?
We talked about a single guy in Tampa, whose mom took out a newspaper ad to get him some holiday…uh, lovin. Yes, Jason’s mom took out a $500 ad in The Tampa Tribune to help him land a wife – or at least a few potential candidates – by Christmas. If you’re interested, she’s asking you to send a photo and a letter to her. She’ll respond with a thank-you note and send each reply to her son, who says he will meet with every person. Ladies is this sweet or sad?
According to a recent study, today’s text messaging relieves eases some of the pressure on dating. But is it a good thing? A buddy of mine was dumped by a girl over a text message. He texted her back a mean message blasting her for breaking up with him that way. Did she deserve a nasty return text for doing him wrong?
Did you ever get intimate in your parent’s bedroom? A friend of mine was watching their house for a few days while they were away, and wouldn’t you know, his girlfriend came over and well…ya know. Should you ever get intimate in any bed but your own? I thought it was a little too bizarre. I told him I wouldn’t have done it. Have you ever been with someone in someone else’s bed?
Are you happy in your career, or do you wish you would have followed a different path? What would you have rather done? If you could pick any job in the world, what would it be?
My cohost noticed that a lot of parents put their kids in matching outfits even when they’re not twins and asked why. I was surprised by the number of calls on that. One reason is so they don’t fight over who gets what, while others said it makes it easier to keep track of them in public. The strangest was a mother who said she’d buy matching clothes for her sons, but one set in green and the other in blue. She said they’re now out on their own and the one who preferred the green outfits lives in a green house while his brother’s house is blue.
What’s your favorite quote of 2008? Here are the Top 10 quotes of 2008, as compiled by the editor of the Yale Book of Quotations:
1. I can see Russia from my house!” — Comedian Tina Fey, while impersonating Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin on the TV comedy show “Saturday Night Live,” broadcast Sept. 13.
2. “All of them, any of them that have been in front of me over all these years.” — Palin, responding to a request by CBS anchor Katie Couric to name the newspapers or magazines she reads, broadcast Oct. 1.
3. “We have sort of become a nation of whiners.” — former Sen. Phil Gramm, an economic adviser to Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain, quoted in The Washington Times, July 10.
4. “It’s not based on any particular data point, we just wanted to choose a really large number.” — a Treasury Department spokeswoman explaining how the $700 billion number was chosen for the initial bailout, quoted on Forbes.com Sept. 23.
5. “The fundamentals of America’s economy are strong.” — McCain, in an interview with Bloomberg TV, April 17.
6. “Decisions by the Secretary pursuant to the authority of this Act are non-reviewable and committed to agency discretion, and may not be reviewed by any court of law or any administrative agency.” — the Treasury Department’s proposed Emergency Economic Stabilization Act, September 2008.
7. “Maybe 100.” — McCain, discussing in a town hall meeting in Derry, New Hampshire, how many years U.S. troops could remain in Iraq, Jan. 3.
8. “I’ll see you at the debates, b——.” — Paris Hilton in a video responding to a McCain television campaign ad, August 2008.
9. “Barack, he’s talking down to black people. … I want to cut his … off.” — Rev. Jesse Jackson, overheard over a live microphone before a Fox News interview, July 6.
10. (tie) “Cash for trash.” — Paul Krugman discussing the financial bailout, New York Times, Sept. 22.
(tie) “There are no atheists in foxholes and there are no libertarians in financial crises.” — Krugman, in an interview with Bill Maher on HBO’s “Real Time,” broadcast Sept. 19.
(tie) “Anyone who says we’re in a recession, or heading into one — especially the worst one since the Great Depression — is making up his own private definition of “`recession.’” — commentator Donald Luskin, the day before Lehman Brothers filed for bankruptcy, The Washington Post, Sept. 14.
I once sold _____ to go _____. We found out in a recent conversation that one of our listeners actually sold cocaine to go to church camp. He said that his family was really poor and he didn’t really have the money to go. He felt that it was really important that he be there and he also didn’t want his friends to leave him and have all the fun so he happened upon some cocaine… he sold enough to put himself through church camp.
I once traded _____ for _____. Almost the same situation as above but a different topic… My cohost had a friend in college who traded a 6-pack of Heineken for a car. One friend had a piece car and he was going to take it to the junk yard but there was another friend who desperately needed a car. The guy said, “buy me a 6-pack of beer and I’ll give you my car!”
We did the “Worst Handyman,” a guy who thinks he knows what he’s doing and really doesn’t. We awarded dinner for two to a woman who’s husband “fixed” a small leak by turning it into a gusher, then two days later, set the top of the stove on fire while trying to “fix” the computer panel (timer, etc.). We started this by talking about how my co-host was going to try to fix his clothes dryer, and we had women calling him begging him to call a repairman.
What fan clubs did you belong to when you were younger? Lots of good phones here, too, particularly after my co-host admitted being in the Barbra Streisand club. I ‘fessed up to being in the “Star Trek” fan club in the late 60’s, and our listeners contributed Kiss, the Archies and more.
Did you ever do anything stupid or crazy when you were living single that you would never do now? What was your furniture like when you were single? What were some of the survival foods of your bachelor days? Hamburger Helper topped the list followed by Ramen noodles.
I saw a cool movie poll online, but I couldn’t find the source. So we debated it on the air. The list was of the top 10 “sexiest movie off all time”:
1. Out of Sight (1998)
2. His Girl Friday (1940)
3. Mr. and Mrs. Smith (2005)
4. Body Heat (1981)
5. Bull Durham (1988)
6. Don’t Look Now (1973)
7. Y Tu Mama Tambien (2001)
8. The Last of the Mohicans (1992)
9. A Walk on the Moon (1999)
10. Before Sunset (2004)
When you were a kid, what did you do in class to pass the time? Did you ever consider dropping out cause you were so bored? Do you have a boring job now? Why is it so boring?
We got on the discussion of food that we once really liked and now can’t stand. My co-host talked about key lime pie, which for many years really enjoyed and now he can barely look at it. This was a fun topic and we received calls with plenty of food mentioned including shrimp, liver, sweet potatoes and one woman said she is disgusted by cucumbers. She said they taste like soap to her now.
What the corniest thing you did this weekend? My cohost was taking a road trip back over the weekend and he felt like he was in the mood to listen to a little “Dido.” He listened to the entire first album and then decided to come home and sit and rub his dog for an entire hour… this led us into our phoner.
We talked about The Man Rules one day (like never dissing Chuck Norris) and then took calls on The Woman Rules. That got my cohost going on how her 12-year old son, had recently explained guys’ bathroom rules to her. My favorite was, “look straight ahead…or up.” When she said those rules were stupid and women didn’t have any, the ladies started calling in with what they wished were rules. Everything from courtesy flushes to not talking to the stranger in the stall next to you. Apparently we really take our bathroom breaks seriously.
Time to vent. Co-workers who leave their cell phones unattended. Have you noticed that the more annoying a ring tone is, the more likely the owner is no where to be found? And what’s the etiquette…if a woman leaves her purse near you with her incredibly annoying phone constantly going off, is it okay to rummage through her personal belongings so you can find it? Furthermore, is it okay to destroy the phone? If they really wanted it, they would have it with them, right? Can you tell that our drive-time jock’s phone has been going off as I write this?
WEIRD NEWS
Obama: A Very Wise Man?
There’s a new addition to nativity scenes being sold in Italy this Christmas season — Barack Obama and his wife Michelle — to be added along side the baby Jesus and wise men! The production of handmade figurines for nativity scenes is big business in Italy and craftsman Genny Di Virgilio says Obama has become a top seller. Italian tradition requires that the nativity scene be built up over time until Christmas Eve, when baby Jesus is put in the manger as the very last element of the display. As always, figurine-makers provide a chance to choose a more light-hearted approach for the scene providing replicas of personalities who have made the news during the last year. Along with Obama, other top selling figurines include French President Nicolas Sarkozy and his wife Carla Bruni and even Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi. While cherished by many, some people say the arrival of celebrity figurines spoils the traditional sense of Christmas. (Reuters)
It’s Not My Fault I Lost $900 Million!
In Melbourne, Australia, gambler Harry Kakavas is suing the Crown Casino after losing– $909 million dollars! No kidding. But Harry says it’s not his fault and that the management targeted him after learning of his gambling addiction. Actually, Kakavas has been banned from every casino in Australia since 2007 because of his problem and his attorney claims the managers at Crown Casino knew this and just didn’t care. Court documents alleged that emails detailed a Crown plan to lure back Kakavas and if found guilty, Crown could be judged to have breached Australia’s Trade Practices Act, state gambling regulations and special laws covering the high-profile casino’s operation. (Reuters)
2,000-Year-Old Brain Discovered
In a muddy pit at the University of York in England, British archeologist Rachel Cubitt has made a most amazing find — a 2,000-yeasr-old brain. The brain is a bit shrunken but preserved very well in the skull she dug up. Researchers were amazed at how the brain dating back before the Roman conquest of Britain did not decompose. The oldest preserved brains were found in Florida back in 1986 and are dated to be 8,000 years old. (Ananova)
The Irony of Foreclosures
How’s this for irony. In Miami, one local resident has come up with his own unique solution to the twin problems of foreclosures and homeless people. Using the Internet and volunteer teams, Max Rameau uses his “Take Back the Land Foundation” to match the homeless with vacant homes that were foreclosed on. Since January he has helped six families find temporary dwellings, although his efforts are expected to generate controversy. Rameau told USA Today, “It’s morally indefensible to have vacant homes sitting there, potentially for years, while you have human beings on the street.” But Rameau is not alone in his efforts to help the homeless have temporary shelter. Housing advocates in Cleveland are attempting to tap city money to purchase abandoned houses which they plan to rent out to the homeless. Atlanta homeowners are even willing to pay the homeless to stay in the meantime in their foreclosed homes while guarding the property at the same time. (Ananova)
Too Stupid For Tattoos
If it’s possible to be too stupid to get a tattoo — 25-year-old Darnell Frazier of St. Paul, Minnesota wins the prize. Darnell was pulled over by a police officer and claimed he never had a photo ID and said his name was Darnell Lewis. The officer might have bought it had Darnell not had the word “Frazier” tattooed in large letters on the side of his neck — which kind of gave him away. After his true identity was confirmed, he was arrested on four misdemeanor warrants, including driving while disqualified and no proof of insurance. He also had at least two outstanding arrest warrants, a probation violation for bringing a stolen vehicle into Minnesota and a failure to appear in Hennepin County on a drug charge. (AHN News)
A Nutty Car
In Demotte, Indiana, Hope Wideup has a nutty car — quite literally. When she popped open her hood to find out why all her warning indicator lights were on and her windshield wipers had stopped working, she found walnuts — thousands of walnuts! She thinks perhaps a chipmunk may have found its way into her car– which had been sitting idle for several weeks– and used it as a storage depot. The total damage done will only cost her $242 so it could have been a lot worse. Hope says, “It’s funny, but it’s not.” (AHN News)
Near Naked Giants Fan
The New York Giants could use another sack — not on the football field — in the stands — to cover one fan who doesn’t like to wear much in the way of clothing. Sondra Fortunato went to Giants Stadium last week wearing a Santa Claus outfit, a tiara, fishnet stockings, a bathing suit bottom and high-heeled boots. She also had a suitcase and two 11-by-17 signs reading “Go Giants” and “Have a No Guns Christmas,” referring to the team’s wide receiver shooting himself in the leg. She insists nothing naughty was showing even though she’s “well-endowed.” As the middle-aged woman puts it, “You couldn’t even see my underwear.” But the Giants saw things a bit differently. Security guards escorted her out, saying signs and baggage weren’t allowed and telling her to cover up because there were children present. She figures other women “got jealous and complained.” (New York Post)
Cable Guy Calendar
Time Warner Cable has introduced a tongue-in-cheek new calendar in New York City for 2009. The calendar features its technicians and call center representatives posing while having fun. Mr. January grins while connecting cables for three admiring women. Mr. February forgot to button his shirt before delivering a bunch of cables formed into flowers. And Ms. September plucks remote controls from a tree as if they were fruit. So how do you get one of these must have items? You get one free — if you upgrade your cable package to include Showtime. Here’s an idea — why don’t you put a calendar with pictures showing cable guys showing up on time? Oh wait — I know why — because you could find 12 pictures of that actually happening in one year!!!!! (myway.com)
THIS OR THAT
Two choices: you gotta pick one and tell us why!
· White Christmas lights or Multi-colored lights
· Elves or Talking Reindeer
· Spirit of Christmas Past, Present or Future
· Holly or Mistletoe
· Parking far away at a mall or Waiting in a long checkout line
· Cleaning the Reindeer stalls or Being Santa’s personal masseuse
· Candy Canes or Carmel Corn
· Hot buttered Rum or a “Flaming Punch”
· Grinch or Scrooge
· Herbie the Elf or Yukon Cornelius
SHOW ME A SIGN
We had backstage passes and front-row seats to a concert to give away, so we asked listeners to make the most outrageous, attention-grabbing sign they could create. Then, at 6:30 Friday morning, they had to meet us at the busiest intersection in town and attract as much attention as they possibly could. The winner actually had his van painted-up, and he stood on top for an hour and a half, jumping up and down, screaming with a “honk” sign. Sounded great on the air, and the police eventually had to break it up.
REDNECK FOODS
In the South where we are, people eat some weird stuff. We sent someone to the grocery store to pick up a few of these items and sampled them during the show. We ate Triscuit crackers topped with cream cheese and pepper jelly; some potted meat, Spam and sardines. After everyone ate, we read out the ingredients to let everyone know what they just had. One person clutched the trash can after the first bite.
TOP FIVE REASONS WHY THAT IRAQI REPORTER THREW HIS SHOES AT PRESIDENT BUSH
1. Because Dick Cheney was too far away
2. He thought about it… his Nike’s told him to “Just do it”
3. The reporter thought shoe repair would be a nice retirement hobby
4. Bush has just said, “It’s time to heal” so he threw some at him
5. He forgot to bring pies
HUNTER’S HUMOR by Tim Hunter
They’ve been having record low temperatures in Denver this week. If fact, they say it’s so cold, at this Sunday’s Bronco’s game, they may not even try to start up the Zamboni.
A big cold snap has hit the Midwest. In fact, in Illinois, its so cold the governor was only selling heated seats.
Archeologists in Europe claim they’ve found a 2,000-year-old shopping mall. One of the stores was a mummifying shop called, “21 Forever.”
Everything inside the ancient mall was fairly well preserved except for the Hickory Farms Beefstick: it was just like brand-new.
FILL IN THE BLANK
· A new study says that one of the biggest points of contention in divorce cases these days is who gets the _______. (pet)
· In New Jersey, a man is really ticked off after discovering that his _________ was the cause of the recent fire in his home. (Comcast cable box)
· After 25 years of Islamic rule, Sudan is going to once again allow _________ in their country. (beer)
BACK TO YOU
Get two people on the phone and give them a topic (household appliances, cars, etc.) and they have 30 seconds to go back and forth naming them. If they stumble, they lose.
CELL PHONE FUN
Get two listeners on cell phones and have them compete for a big prize. They can be in the mall, at a fast food restaurant, in their car stuck in traffic, whatever… but they need to have access to other people. So get them on and ask questions like: “Name all the Brady kids.” They, hopefully, won’t know all of them and they have to go around to those around them and ask complete strangers these questions in that panicky prize pig voice. (If the contestant does know the answer without asking — thus, putting the kibosh on the tomfoolery — you can always hang-up and pretend the cell went dead. Hey, it happens.)
RULES ARE RULES
Maxim came up with a list of Man Rules… so we decided women need a set of rules of their own.
The Man Rules (according to Maxim):
1. Never redo a high-five. If you mess it up, let it go.
2. The “shotgun rule” is always in effect.
3. If you’re white, never leave the sticker on your New Era hat.
4. Only call your girlfriend once a day.
5. Never use the term love-making, except when you’re trying to get laid.
6. Men should never, in any way, feed each other.
7. Never dis Chuck Norris.
The Woman Rules (according to listeners)
1. Never wear a jean jacket with jeans.
2. Never take your friend’s last tampon.
3. It’s okay to borrow a razor, but not to use for your naughty parts.
4. Never wear shorts or short skirts without shaving your legs.
5. Don’t date another friend’s sloppy seconds…it was sloppy for a reason.
6. It’s sister before misters… always.
7. In the presence of your mother-in-law, she always knows more than you, but only in her presence.
8. You’re forbidden to look hotter than your son’s girlfriend.
9. Never use the “C” word or the “P” word.
10. If you plan on getting drunk, remember to wear your panties.
11. Never use another woman’s compact without asking.
12. Put the brush down and walk away slowly, don’t tease your bangs.
13. Don’t wear strappy sandals with crusty feet.
14. Never share your panties with your friends, or purchase from Goodwill.
15. Should never tell a man you love him first.
16. And never sleep with a man on the first date.
WRAP IT UP FOR THE HOLIDAYS
We gave movie tickets to the person who could wrap a partner with 5 rolls of toilet paper in the least amount of time. It ended up taking the winner (who wrapped up his 10-year-old daughter) just over 12 minutes to completely use up all the rolls. Made for some good laughs on the air and some great pics for the web site.
GERM WARFARE
(Men’s Health) The government says millions of Americans get sick from handborne bacteria each year, and 80,000 of them die. Which should make you approach public restrooms warily. Here’s where the worst latrine bacteria hide:
· Sink – 500,000 bacteria per 100 square centimeters
· Floor – 5,600 bacteria per 100 centimeters
· Paper Towel Handle – 2,200 bacteria per 100 square centimeters
· Urinal Handle – 1,600 bacteria per 100 square centimeters
· Bathroom Door Handle – 1,200 bacteria per 100 centimeters
· Toilet Seat – 1,180 bacteria per 100 square centimeters
· Flush Handle – 510 bacteria per 100 square centimeters
The average bacteria counts on professionals clothing:
· Teacher – 17,800 bacteria per square inch
· Accountants – 6,030 bacteria per square inch
· Bankers – 5,400 bacteria per square inch
· Doctors – 2,620 bacteria per square inch
· Lawyers – 900 bacteria per square inch
BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION
It seems like they’ve got blow-ups for every holiday now… like giant turkeys, pumpkins, heart and Santa’s. We had stunt boy drive around town with a giant blow-up of Santa on the roof to see how other drivers respond. After a while we’ll change her location and have them tell us what’s different? Could do this with a blow-up that’s out of season.
WHAT DID WE LEARN?
What did we learn with (your show) yesterday” to win $50. This is a great recycling bit to pass along a little extra mad money for spring. Tell listeners not to miss the 7am hour since that’s when you pop the “What Did We Learn” question about what you heard in the 7am hour from the previous day’s show.
BATTLE OF THE SEXES
For Men:
· According to a new poll, which movie was rated the “sexiest of all time”? “Out of Sight” ***, “Mr. and Mrs. Smith”, or “Body Heat”.
· What are little girls made of? “Ribbons, bows and fairy toes,” “Sugar, spice and all things nice” ***, or “Chocolate, candy and all things dandy”.
· Duran Duran sang about girls on what? Horses, Film ***, or The Run.
· Breast implants cannot be made of what? Polyester ***, Saline, Silicone.
For Women:
· In college football, what does the “C” in BCS stand for? College, Championship ***, or Center. (Bowl Championship Series)
· Jim Zorn is the coach of which NFL team? Redskins ***, Cowboys, or the Raiders.
· Which gaming system is the better seller? Wii ***, or Xbox.
· Which type of DVD player will produce the highest quality picture? Progressive Scan, Blu-Ray ***, or one with Upconversion.
GORSEFEATHERS by Patrick Gorse
Sources are reporting that Paula Abdul is leaving “American Idol” at the end of the season. The problem is irreconcilable differences…everybody else shows up for work sane and sober.
Saturday marked the 5th anniversary of the capture of Saddam Hussein. What do you give a guy on the wood anniversary when he already has a pine coffin?
The Chicago Tribune is reporting that businessmen with ties to the Rev. Jesse Jackson met with Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich to discuss a deal for Obama’s Senate seat. Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr. said that his father would “never cross any lines.” I don’t know…when you’ve called Jews “Hymies,” paid for a child you fathered out of wedlock with charity contributions and threatened to cut off the genitals of the President-elect, I think you’ve already established your credentials as a line-crosser.
Poor Jesse Jackson Jr. He’s disadvantaged because he grew up in a very bad neighborhood–Near the Illinois statehouse.
A lot of people were shocked by the actions of Governor Rod Blagojevich, but crooked politics is a tradition in Illinois. In fact, Abraham Lincoln used to keep kickbacks stashed in his stove pipe hat. You remember his famous speech…four score and seven bleeping bribes ago.
And Barack Obama is part and parcel of the sleazy Chicago tradition. He’s always said, “A sweet Tony Rezko house deal divided against itself cannot stand.”
A political science study revealed that since 1971, 1,000 Illinois public servants have been convicted of corruption. To his credit, originally, Governor Blagojevich tried to solve that problem. But he couldn’t appoint enough crooked judges.
The auto rescue plan has stalled in Congress, and Michigan Governor Jennifer Granholm said, “The automakers are drowning.” Ted Kennedy replied, “I had nothing to do with it.”
The bad economy is even depressing children. I put a choo-choo train under the Christmas tree. My kid parked his Hot Wheels on the tracks with a goodbye note attached to it.
Boy… early-winter freezing temperatures have gripped the nation. It was so cold in Illinois; Gov. Rod Blagojevich was selling Senate seat-warmers.
Congress lowered the pay of the Secretary of State last week to get Hillary Clinton around a constitutional hurdle that keeps lawmakers who voted for an office’s pay raise from assuming that job. The reduction will cost Mrs. Clinton $4,700 a year. Bill Clinton approved of the move saying it’s not unusual for secretaries who don’t put out to have their pay cut.
James Bond actor Daniel Craig told “Extra TV” that he has a soft side, and that he can be “moved by television commercials about toilet rolls.” ‘Moved’ in what way, Daniel? Man, it was freezing across the country this week. It was so cold—as Air Force One was preparing to leave Washington D.C., a guy threw snowshoes at President Bush.
It was so cold in Idaho; Larry Craig was tapping his toes in the restroom just to keep from getting frostbite.
The Senate’s attempts to pass the Big Three automaker rescue bill sputtered, broke down and eventually got junked. In fact, the bill was exactly like the Big Three automaker’s 2008 product line.
The Democratic Illinois Attorney General and their Democratic Lt. Governor were on “Meet the Press” Sunday discussing extraordinary legal attempts to force Gov. Rod Blagojevich from office. So the governor’s own party is disgusted and they’re trying to pull the rug out from under him. And fashion-conscious gay hairstylists are disgusted and they’re trying to pull the rug off the top of him.
While President Bush visited Baghdad on Sunday, an Iraqi news reporter was arrested after throwing both his shoes at the President and referring to Mr. Bush as “you dog.” The reporter was charged with assaulting a head of state and impersonating Randy Jackson.
During the shoe-throwing incident, the President was true to his word. Mr. Bush has always said that when the barefoot Iraqis stand up, we’ll duck down.
The first shoe completely missed President Bush, but the second one seemed to graze his hair. However, a brave Mr. Bush continued the ceremony after being pronounced unhurt by Dr. Scholl’s.
It was the first time a reporter has thrown anything at a U.S. president since Helen Thomas tossed some panties and a hotel room key at John Kennedy.
So much for Iraqi security forces being up to snuff—That reporter had time to throw one shoe and miss… than take another shoe off and throw that before being apprehended. However, Iraqi authorities are disputing that version of the events saying there was a second shoe thrower on the grassy knoll.
On ABC’s “This Week” Sunday morning, John McCain said that the southern part of Afghanistan isn’t “under control of the government” or U.S. forces.
Apparently, southern Afghanistan is a lawless area controlled by extremists and foreign influences that are willing to do anything to mess up the government. Really, it’s just like the southern region of the U.S……
Asked by host George Stephanopoulos how you get over a tough presidential loss, John McCain said, “Get busy, get busy, get busy.” Yes, because you never know when a losing moment is going to be the right moment.
The bad economy is killing the holiday shopping business. Sales are slower than Brett Favre running a quarterback sweep.
Did you watch football on Sunday? In the New York Jets win over Buffalo, 39-year-old quarterback Brett Favre had a 25-yard run. I don’t want to say Brett is slow; but the run started in the first quarter, and ended in the third quarter.
Brett Favre’s 25-yard run took forever. They gave the 2:00 minute warning during the play. Not because it was near the end of the half or the game… two minutes into the run, the refs warned Favre that he needed to pick up the pace.
WHY WE THINK SANTA’S A WOMAN
Think about it — Christmas is a big warm, organized, fuzzy nurturing social deal and I have a tough time believing a guy could pull it off.
For starters, most men don’t even think about selecting gifts until 3pm on Christmas Eve And once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves. On this count alone, I’m convinced Santa is a woman. Surely if he were a man, the universe would wake up Christmas morning to find a rotating Chia Pet under the tree, still in the bag.
Another problem for Santa would be getting there. First of all there would be no reindeer, because they would be dead, gutted, and strapped on to the rear bumper of the sleigh amid wide eyed, desperate claims that buck season had been extended. Blitzen’s rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist.
Even if male Santa had reindeer, he’d still have transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost in the clouds and refuse to ask for directions.
Other reasons Santa can’t possibly be a man:
· Men can’t pack a bag
· Men would rather be dead than be caught wearing red velvet
· Men would feel their masculinity would be threatened, having to be seen with all those elves
· Men don’t answer their mail
· Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in jest as anything remotely resembling a “bowl full of jelly”
· Men aren’t interested in stockings unless somebody’s wearing them
· Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment
Is there any doubt Santa has to be a woman?
WORST CHRISTMAS SONGS
· I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus
· We Three Stooges
· All I Want For Christmas Is Not To Be Impeached
· Lick the Halls
· Hark the Herald Angel’s Peeing
· God Rest Ye Hairy Gentlemen
· Oh Holy Fright
· Silent Fart
· It Came Upon A Midnight Clear, And I Still Have The Dress
· The First Bowel
· Fisty The Snowman
· Splinter Wonderland
· Jingle Balls
· We Wish You A Mary
· Oh Come All Ye Cold Sores
ROOF SIT
Last weekend we spent 72 hours up on the roof of a Wal-Mart Super Center. It was our annual “Roof Sit to Benefit Toys for Tots.” Every December, we vow to collect 10 thousand toys. This year we got 15 thousand toys and 20 thousand dollars for the cause. It was cold, wet, and windy but when you look at the good on Christmas morning it is all worth it.
WHAT OUR FEATURES SAY ABOUT US
DivineCaroline.com says physical characteristics such as eye shape and finger lengths can actually indicate certain personality traits.
Eyes
· One way to analyze the eyes is to figure out whether you have wide-set or narrow-set eyes.
· Narrow: Closed-minded, dependent on others, very focused
· Wide: Open-minded, aversion to authority figures, independent
· Balanced: Good judgment, a balanced perspective on situations
Nose
· In Chinese face reading, the nose is related to how one deals with financial matters
· Big Nose: Could get too caught up in money
· Small Nose: Shy, timid
· Wide Nose: Emotional, laid-back
· Thin Nose: Tightly-wound, temperamental
Mouth
· The shape of your lips offers insight into your role within the relationships you have with others.
· Small Lips: Self-involved, stingy, greedy
· Large Lips: Giving, affinity for the finer things
· Full Lips: Emotional, caring, empathetic
· Thin Lips: Logical, introverted, cut off from emotions
· Thinner Upper Lip: Selfish, unable to give equally in relationships
· Thinner Lower Lip: Excessively generous in relationships
TOP FIVE TOPICS AT THIS YEAR’S SANTA CLAUS CONVENTION
1. “No one’s going to take care of your elf, but you”
2. “Sleighs: Regular or Hybrid?”
3. “Thatch roofs and what you can do about them”
4. “The milk & cookie diet”
5. “Database your list and stop checking it twice”
TOP FIVE SIGNS THIS IS GOING TO BE A LONG WEEK
1. You woke up and Lindsay Lohan is your roommate
2. When you first arrived at work, someone asked “Is it Friday yet?”
3. You see an ad in the paper offering your job
4. There’s another ad offering your wife
5. Rosie O’Donnell wants to talk with you
