12.03.08

SHOW PREP DECEMBER 3, 2008

HOLLYWOOD 411 . . .

Jada Pinkett Smith has flatly refused to work with husband Will Smith. Hollywood star Jada Pinkett Smith has admitted she refuses to make another film with her husband Will MyMsn reports. The pair previously appeared on screen together in the Fresh Prince Of Bel Air and, later, Ali and Jada had asked Will to direct her in The Human Contract. “The family that directs together has to work hard to stay together!” Jada explained. “Will wanted to do Madagascar with me but we decided to stay married. I love being in control. I plan on being in control on a film sometime next year as well.” (Handbag)

Former Spice Girl Victoria Beckham is helping Gordon Ramsay’s wife Tana deal with claims the chef has been having an affair. Gordon Ramsay’s wife Tana has called on Victoria Beckham to help her deal with claims her husband Gordon has been having an affair for the last seven years an insider has told the Sunday People. “Victoria has been a tower of strength to Tana. She may be thousands of miles away in LA, but she’s proved a true friend and her level-headed advice is just what Tana needs right now,” the source claims. “She, of all people, understands what Tana is going through and how you need someone a step removed to off-load all the frustration on. Tana has always respected the way Victoria handled the Rebecca Loos scandal, holding her head up high and refusing to give up on her marriage, when it comes to handling the media storm Victoria is an expert. She just never expected to be in the same position.” (Handbag)

Dakota Fanning is glad she sacrificed a normal childhood to pursue her movie career – as the teenage actress always wanted to be different from her peers. The 14-year-old shot to stardom in 2001’s I Am Sam, alongside Sean Penn, and has since starred on the big screen with Tom Cruise and Julia Roberts. And Fanning is adamant that she has learnt more from her movie experiences than she would have done as an ordinary schoolgirl. She says, “I don’t want to be normal. This is my childhood. I’ve been to Australia, traveled and learned about different cultures – some people never leave the country in their entire lifetime. My job has opened my mind up and enriched my childhood.” (Teen Hollywood)

Mariah Carey can look forward to plenty of romantic winter breaks in the future – her husband Nick Cannon has reportedly bought her a luxury ski chalet in Aspen, Colorado. The rapper/actor, who wed the superstar in April, is said to have splashed out $1.5 million on a five-bedroomed ski lodge in the exclusive snow-filled resort as a Christmas present for his new wife. A source tells British newspaper the Daily Mirror, “Nick is clearly still in the honeymoon phase. He’s shocked all their pals by going out of his way to buy Mariah this beautiful sanctuary. He knows Aspen is one of her favorite places in the world so this is his early Christmas present to her.” (Teen Hollywood)

There’s a new couple on the “Gossip Girl” set. Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr were spotted canoodling at the Dallas airport before boarding a flight to La Guardia Airport Sunday night. Our spy snitched, “They were trying to be discreet by stealing kisses near the gate.” The duo rode coach, according to the source, who added, “they were kissing in the aisles, but once they sat, she read her script and he drank a Heineken.” A rep for both stars said, “We do not discuss our clients’ personal life.” (Page Six)

Of the hundreds of people at Europe’s most prestigious debutante ball, the Crillon Bal, Ashton Kutcher seemed the most out of place. As the stepfather of Scout LaRue Willis – one of 23 young beauties from around the world making her debut – Kutcher was congratulated on Scout’s “coming out.” Appearing utterly confused, Kutcher looked at the dance floor and joked, “As far as I know, she’s dancing with boys.” Scout, resplendent in a Christian Lacroix gown, also had her parents on hand, Demi Moore and Bruce Willis, who was with his gorgeous girlfriend Emma Heming. CAA biggie Bryan Lourd watched Billie, his daughter by Carrie Fisher, debut in Chanel while French actor Alain Delon clapped for his girl Anouchka in Elie Saab and Catherine Oxenberg applauded daughter India in J. Mendel. (Page Six)

Kate Moss has finally come clean about who gave her the scratches on her cheek she recently sported: boyfriend and the Kills guitarist Jamie Hince. Moss had previously claimed a box of Christmas decorations fell on her head, but Britain’s Daily Mail reports she was overheard at a London party for designer Stella McCartney admitting that she was actually involved in a “scuffle” with Hince over their holiday plans. Hince, for his part, was left with a black eye, which Moss says was the result of her “chunky ring.” The on- again/ off-again pair are still reportedly on. (Page Six)

Brad Pitt hinted that he and Angelina Jolie will eventually tie the knot. “If we feel it’s important to our kids, we would,” he tells Today show’s Ann Curry in a new interview about his Make It Right Foundation project in New Orleans. (See video, above.) Of his six children, he says, “I’m really proud of this family. I look at my sons and daughters. … I feel rich being around them. Each one offers so much to the mix.” But Pitt — who attended the premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button with Jolie in New Orleans on Monday — says he tries to avoid talking about his kids.  “I just walk away feeling bad about it when I do,” he says, adding that what he has to say about the family “seems to get cheapened somehow as it goes through the filter and the airwaves. I just want to keep it close to the chest.” Jolie previously admitted that their children ask them why she and Pitt haven’t wed yet. “Usually people fall in love and everything revolves around the ritual of marriage, children are an afterthought. We did everything backwards,” she recently told the Italian edition of Vanity Fair. “But sooner or later it will be the kids who ask us [to get married],” she added. “You know, they see films and start asking questions. Such as, ‘Why are Shrek and Fiona married and you’re not?’” (US Weekly)

Camilla Belle and Twilight’s Robert Pattinson were spotted lunching together Sunday at Three Square Bakery in Venice, Calif. Pattinson was even spotted opening and closing Belle’s car door. Despite the afternoon date, a source tells Us that Belle (who recently attended the L.A. premiere of Twilight) and Jonas have not split. Stay tuned!  (Page Six)

Audrina Patridge may not be the pushover she sometimes comes across as on The Hills! The scorned lover/friend has taken to her blog to “clear the air” and…. Lauren Conrad is gonna be pissed! Says Audrina: In last night’s episode, Lauren and I resolved things ~ I guess third time’s the charm! After the smoke finally cleared we were both able to sit down and have an actual adult conversation. I didn’t ask to be informed, falsely or otherwise, that my “best friend” and my “boyfriend” were involved in some carnal activity. It was very disturbing to have a rumor that could have easily been killed, thrown in my face over and over again.  I just want to put it on record that never did I EVER call Lauren a “slut,” “bad friend,” “shady person,” etc… I simply asked her a question and that’s how she interpreted it. I didn’t go around town running my mouth either. I confided in Heidi because she knows how Lauren works and when Lauren hung up on me and was acting like a child, I obviously thought the worst. I do always find it interesting to watch the episodes and see what senseless gossip people come up with! Bottom line, Justin and Lauren treating me like I wasn’t worthy of an explanation was almost worse than the rumor itself, and it only got worse the harder I tried to get a genuine answer. Instead, I got screamed at and they both got super defensive. Let me just remind everyone that this rumor didn’t appear out of thin air, they were both at the same place at the same time, but apparently what was said to have happened never actually did. I am very glad this whole thing is over and this blog will be the last time I address the issue. As for Justin, his inexcusable behavior has become somewhat expected at this point and I just want to say that if I were looking for a serious relationship, I would definitely be looking elsewhere! Dealing with a situation such as this one, where the two people who you really need to talk to are the very same two who turn their backs on you and treat you like you mean nothing, has really opened my eyes. I have never been one to hold grudges though, life is just too precious. So I guess I learned a very valuable lesson this week ~ communication is NOT key, so if something bothers you, keep your mouth shut and smile, or you will end up apologizing later.   (Perez Hilton)

Eva Longoria was in Puerto Rico this past weekend for a girlfriend’s wedding and, boy, was she smoking like a chimney! The picture officially kills the pregnancy rumor. Why don’t you ever show off your dirrrrrty habit here in Hollywood, Eva? (Perez Hilton)

Brad Pitt has admitted that he can’t cook, saying that he can just about manage a BBQ. “I can rock a Sunday BBQ but that’s as far as my culinary talents go,” said the Ocean’s Thirteen star. And it seem Angelina Jolie, with whom Pitt has six children, is not much better. When asked what his partner’s signature dish was, Pitt replied: “cereal”. (British Glamour)

American Idol judge Simon Cowell is convinced Britney Spears is in awe of him – because she appeared to be starstruck when they met. The music mogul was delighted that the pop superstar agreed to appear on his British TV talent show X Factor on Saturday night, and the pair first came face-to-face at the London studio. And Cowell is adamant that Spears was overwhelmed by the meeting. He says, “This may be a bit egotistical. I think she was in awe of me. She was just staring at me. I said, ‘Touch me, I’m human,’ and I think I broke the ice.” Cowell has also defended Spears’ decision to lip-sync her performance on the show, insisting she still put on a fantastic show. He adds, “There was more buzz, more excitement for this girl, than anyone else. It was as if the president was on the show. She was terrific. Very professional. This girl’s got huge star quality. You’ve got to hand it to her, she’s a great performer.” (Teen Hollywood)

Lindsay Lohan has taken to her online blog to slam reports she is to split from girlfriend Samantha Ronson. The pair, who have been dating since earlier this year, have been dogged with rumors of a break-up following a spate of rows. The couple was recently spotted arguing in New York, and Britain’s The Sun newspaper reported last month that they rowed outside London nightclub Boujis – with Lohan left “in tears” after the incident. But the Mean Girls actress is sick of the rumors, and is adamant she and Ronson are still together. She writes on her MySpace blog, “rumors.. Just to clear this up.. Because I have been getting a lot of emails asking me this one question. Samantha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan (me) are Not breaking up,” before ending the posting with a smiley face. (Teen Hollywood)

Titanic star Leonardo DiCaprio has explained why he won’t cooperate with paparazzi photographers. Leonardo DiCaprio has slammed the paparazzi in a new interview with Digital Spy. “Actually I’m not in the tabloids anymore. I am sometimes, but I’ve watched the culture change. I’m old hat. And I love it. You know what it is with me? This is something I’d like to clarify. I’ve heard people say, ‘Because you hide, it makes you seem ungrateful’,” the Titanic star explained. “The mere fact that these – I’ll use the word piles – are earning money from exploiting my image is the only reason I hide myself or am not a photo-friendly person. I do not like the way they conduct themselves. I think they’re disrespectful and dangerous. The reason I don’t pose or smile or that I seem mad is that I don’t want them to make a living off my private life.” Seems reasonable? (Handbag)

Lindsay Lohan has hit out at social networking site Facebook – on her MySpace profile page. The Mean Girls star regularly posts updates for fans on her MySpace site – and shuns Facebook because pranksters often pose as her to fool other users. But Lohan was shocked when she recently logged on to the site and realized bosses had finally taken action against the jokers. In an entry entitled Upset with Facebook, she says “I signed onto Facebook with my new password because someone keeps hacking into my account, and when I typed my password and ‘log in’ name in, a red sentence came up saying . . . Account Disabled. Your account has been disabled by an administrator. If you have any questions or concerns, you can visit our Faq page here. “Wow! I was in shock. I clicked on the link that they told me to click on and then to another link that said: my account may of been disabled by mistake. once I got to that it gave a note saying why it was disabled which stated… that it was disabled because they believe that I was a fake of myself. Genius. (Teen Hollywood)

Giulio Bertola, who directed the choir at Italy’s famed La Scala theater in 1983-91, has died after a long illness, the opera house said Tuesday. He was 87. La Scala said Bertola died Sunday, but did not elaborate on the cause of death. “A complete musician, director and composer, Giulio Bertola was one of the keepers of the great tradition of Italian choral singing, leaving his mark of extraordinary rigor on La Scala,” the theater said in a statement. Bertola directed the choir for eight La Scala opera premiers, including Verdi’s “Guglielmo Tell” and Rossini’s “I Vespri Siciliani” under artistic director Riccardo Muti. Before joining La Scala, Bertola had directed the choir for Muti’s May 1983 concert for Pope John Paul II. Bertola also worked in theaters including the Fenice, in Venice, and the Academy of Santa Cecilia, in Rome, according to La Repubblica newspaper and other local media reports. No information was immediately available on survivors and funeral arrangements. (Daily Record)

THE OTHER STUFF . . .

Bono’s adding to his résumé for sainthood. For today’s 20th anniversary of World AIDS Day, the U2 frontman and all-around good guy is helping launch (RED)WIRE, a music-themed site to benefit the cause. “Through music [people] are not just celebrating their life, they are celebrating lives and the saving of them,” Bono says in a video message. And he’s getting some help from a few all-star pals. (Daily Record)

There aren’t many surprises on this year’s list of “The 10 Most Fascinating People.” But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Maybe for this 16th annual edition, host Barbara Walters has rounded up the logical choices. For instance, who’s gonna quarrel with including Olympic superswimmer Michael Phelps? Or the country’s most famous hockey mom, Sarah Palin (who also happens to be governor of Alaska, a former vice presidential candidate and, some say, the future of the Republican Party)? Or what about Will Smith and Tom Cruise, who, to put it simply, are Will Smith and Tom Cruise? “This was almost the easiest year that we’ve ever had, because we had so many naturals,” says Walters, summing up the selection process for her special, which airs Thursday at 10 p.m. EST on ABC. “Some of the people you just know you have to do.” Like “30 Rock” star Tina Fey, who helped define Palin to a national electorate with her hilarious impersonation on NBC’s “Saturday Night Live.” Or Rush Limbaugh, the powerful conservative pundit who is now getting ready to take on a new Democratic president. Or like 16-year-old singer-actress Miley Cyrus. Though wildly popular as star of Disney Channel’s “Hannah Montana,” she’s become “a new Miley Cyrus,” says Walters.  “She’s growing up.” (Cyrus also hit a bumpy patch this year due to arguably racy photos by celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz that were published in Vanity Fair.) Maybe not so obvious: Thomas Beatie, who will be interviewed as a representative of what Walters calls a larger subject – the emergence of transgender couples. Frank Langella is yet another name on her list. Why? After decades as an acclaimed actor, the 70-year-old Langella has the buzz of a latter-day breakout star thanks to his new film, “Frost/Nixon,” Walters says. By now, she has the winnowing process down to a science – including how she handles those who didn’t make the final cut. “If a celebrity’s press agent calls, we say, ‘You were right there, you were the 11th! Maybe next year,’” Walters jokes. As usual, the No. 1 Most Fascinating Person of 2008 will be announced on the program. But even here, a jaw-dropping surprise seems unlikely. After all, could it be anyone but President-elect Barack Obama? “I would be the last one to tell you,” laughed Walters, refusing to give her interrogator even a hint. “You could very well be right – but, then again, you never know.” (Daily Record)

And a star was born. On Tuesday – which would have been her 85th birthday – a plaque honoring opera legend Maria Callas was being unveiled at the Manhattan hospital where she came into the world. Callas was born to Greek parents in 1923 at what was then Flower Hospital. The hospital merged with other institutions over the years and is now the Terence Cardinal Cooke Health Care Center. Callas’ mother took her back to Greece. There, she trained and performed before her professional life took her all over the world, including Italy and the U.S. She died in Paris in 1977. An organizer for the event says the hospital plaque comes from Italy, and is made from the same marble that Michelangelo used for sculpture. (Daily Record)

The Osbournes like to celebrate their birthday a bit early! Patriarch Ozzy turns 60 this Wednesday and to commemorate the fact that he’s still bloody alive, Sharon took the rock legend and kids to Vegas to watch The Beatles LOVE by Cirque de Soleil Monday. The Osbourne clan, minus their hardly seen daughter, Aimee, attended the Cirque show and brought 25 guests with them! The partying continued on after that, and…Hmmm….Did Ozzy get some “work” done on his face recently???? (Perez Hilton)

Madonna and Alex Rodriguez are quietly shopping for love nests on the Upper East Side and on the East End, sources told Page Six. A knowledgeable real estate source tells us the kabbalah-crazed pop queen and the skirt-chasing power hitter are “discreetly looking at properties between Fifth and Park avenues, from just above 60th Street through the 80s. “Madonna personally came to look at one house a couple of months ago, and Alex has been looking recently,” the insider said. “We’re talking about private, double-width mansions in the vicinity of $30 million to $60 million.” Madge and A-Rod are also interested in scoring a house “with a garage that you can drive into for additional privacy – although those are rare and hard to come by,” our spy added. Another source said they were also looking in the Hamptons. Madonna’s flack didn’t return a call or e-mail, but A-Rod’s reps denied the two were looking for real estate. Rodriguez, meanwhile, continues to try to unload the old marital home he shared with ex-wife Cynthia – even dropping the price on the four-bedroom, 4,600-square-foot pad at Trump Park Avenue to $10 million, down from the original $14 million, according to the Post’s Braden Keil. A-Rod is also willing to rent it unfurnished for $50,000 a month. Madonna, meanwhile, is hanging on to her Central Park West apartment. Last week, after Page Six revealed he planned on dumping his kids on Thanksgiving to spend the day with Madonna and her kids in New York, a shame-faced A-Rod and Madge flew together on a private jet to Miami, where she performed. While A-Rod did see his children on the holiday, the lovebirds later flew to Mexico City together for the weekend. (Page Six)

Michael Gelman, the famous producer – and sometime on-air personality – of “Live With Regis and Kelly,” must have been glad to get back to work yesterday after a “flight from hell.” Gelman, his wife, Laurie, and their kids were on JetBlue from Ft. Lauderdale to New York. “First we were delayed for several hours due to bad weather,” our onboard spy said. “Then we had an incredibly bumpy and tumultuous ride because we kept getting stuck in other jets’ tailwinds.” The turbulence sickened some passengers – “like four people in Gelman’s row got sick, causing others to throw up. Not a lot of seats had barf bags, so they started doing it in their Terra Chips bags.” When the plane finally reached New York, it had to circle several times before landing, and customers were stuck onboard for another 30 minutes waiting for a gate. A rep for Gelman said, “He did not see anyone” barf. (Page Six)

Women who craved Carrie Bradshaw’s Vivienne Westwood wedding dress from the “Sex and the City” movie are finally getting their chance to own one just like it. Gabriella Risatti, owner of Gabriella New York bridal salon in the Meatpacking District, is making reproductions of the dress for $15,000 today and Thursday only. “We are taking measurements those two days, but only 30 dresses will be made,” Risatti told us. (Page Six)

Naomi Campbell’s rage issues seem to have rubbed off on her billionaire beau, Vladimir Doronin. On Thursday, beachgoers at the Setai in Miami were aghast when the model’s Russian real estate mogul “punched a photographer in the gut.” The snapper was “standing a good distance away” our spy said, when “out of nowhere [Doronin] hit him twice in the stomach.” The incident didn’t rattle the lovebirds much – Campbell and Doronin were spotted Saturday night at Liv nightclub sitting with Diddy and Lenny Kravitz. A rep for Campbell didn’t return calls and Doronin could not be reached. (Page Six)

Forget the pool – once soft-spoken Olympics champ Michael Phelps has turned into a party and poker animal, surrounding himself with bimbos and booze. A source says Phelps spent much of Thanksgiving weekend playing 10-20, no-limit hold-’em at the Borgata in Atlantic City. Although a dealer reports he lost several thousand dollars on Thursday, Phelps was back at the tables Friday. Phelps, who won more than $5,000 in a tournament at Caesars in Vegas, has spent his free time hanging with poker legends like Doyle Brunson. (Page Six)

Peter Morton’s ex-wife, Tarlton, thinks the former Hard Rock Hotel mogul has been snooping on her. And her suspicions seem justified. The leggy mom has been in a bitter custody dispute with the billionaire over their teenage son and daughter. Peter currently has custody but Tarlton sought to get her kids back, claiming she’s been sober following stints last year at Wonderland and Promises. In a Nov. 20 LA Superior Court filing obtained by The Post’s David Finnegan, a private eye says he was hired to dig through Tarlton’s trash. He stated that early last year he found prescription pill bottles made out for Tarlton for Augmentin, Keflex, Percocet and the antidepressant Effexor. And a strand of Tarlton’s blond hair tested “positive for morphine.” (Page Six)

This is the most delicious rumor we have heard in a while! Buzz out of New York City has it that…. Longtime Vogue editor, Anna Wintour, may be on the way out. Her magazine’s poor performance, the equally bad shape of Teen Vogue and the scaling back of Men’s Vogue have Wintour’s head on the chopping block. Word on the street is that Anna may be replaced by French Vogue editor Carine Roitfeld. Oh, the irony! As of now, these are just rumors, but what is confirmed is that Wintour hasn’t had this much bad buzz surrounding her in, like, forever. Seems like her days really might be numbered at Vogue! (Perez Hilton)

Troubled singer Amy Winehouse has stopped talking to husband Blake Fielder-Civil. Amy Winehouse has given up speaking to husband Blake Fielder-Civil after he referred to her as a ‘crack whore’ sources claim. “When Blake called Amy a crack whore she was livid. They had a slanging match on the phone and haven’t spoken since,” an insider tells Showbiz Spy. “Blake is going out of his mind trying to contact her but while she’s in hospital he can’t. Amy feels safe in there and is away from temptation, which can only be a good thing. Amy Winehouse is refusing to speak to him. Amy isn’t actually ill – she checked herself into the hospital for a break. She gets on really well with the nurses and likes being looked after. Being there has the added bonus that Blake can’t get in touch with her.” Yesterday Blake revealed he was to blame for Amy’s drug problems. (Handbag)

Gary Coleman has pleaded no contest to a disorderly conduct charge stemming from a September incident at a bowling alley. The 40-year-old former star of “Diff’rent Strokes” was ordered to pay a $100 fine in a Payson court Tuesday. He also pleaded no contest to a reckless driving charge, which will be waived if he doesn’t have any other violations within a year. According to court documents, Coleman, his wife and his bodyguard were going bowling in Payson, about 60 miles south of Salt Lake City, when Colt Rushton took a few photos of Coleman with his cell phone camera and took a few more of Coleman’s truck in the parking lot. Rushton’s lawyer says Coleman’s wife took Rushton’s cell phone, a scuffle ensued and then Coleman ran into Rushton with his truck as he was backing out of the parking lot. (Daily Record)

The bass player for hipster band the Raconteurs is a cheap layabout who is suing his ex-girlfriend for $10,000 in back rent. “Little” Jack Lawrence dated a woman known only as Kelly for a decade, friends of the ex-girlfriend say. “During that time she totally supported him and paid for everything,” the pal added. “But the second he hit it big with the Raconteurs, he broke up with her and then tried to kick her out of the home she’d lived in for 10 years. He’s despicable.” To make matters worse, Lawrence has even hired lawyers to file suit against Kelly in Nashville, Tenn., for $10,000 he claims she owes him in back rent. Kelly got her revenge the newfangled way – last month she edited his Wikipedia page to read: “Interests: Suing his ex-girlfriend for money.” The entry was edited out on Sunday. A rep for Lawrence didn’t return calls. (Page Six)

A former employee of UCLA Medical Center pleaded guilty Monday to selling information from the medical records of celebrities and high-profile patients, including Britney Spears and Farrah Fawcett, to the National Enquirer. Lawanda Jackson, 49, spoke quietly as she entered her plea to the felony charge of violating federal medical privacy law for commercial purposes in U.S. District Court. She faces a maximum sentence of 10 years in prison, followed by three years of supervised release, and a $250,000 fine. Sentencing is set for May. Jackson and her attorney, Angel Navarro, declined to comment after the hearing. Jackson worked as an administrative specialist at the UCLA hospitals for 32 years and in recent years began using her supervisor’s password to access medical records inappropriately, authorities said. The tabloid deposited checks totaling at least $4,600 into her husband’s checking account beginning in 2006, prosecutors said. Jackson resigned in July 2007 before she could be fired. Jackson and state officials have disclosed that records for Spears, Fawcett and California first lady Maria Shriver were among those breached. Fawcett’s attorney, Kim Swartz, said in April that the star’s cancer diagnosis and details of her treatment showed up in the National Enquirer after an employee at the hospital accessed her medical records. U.S. attorney’s spokesman Thom Mrozek said that no charges have been filed against the Enquirer or any other publications, but that the role of the media is part of the investigation into the privacy breaches. “Certainly there is possible culpability at media outlets if we can determine that they were knowingly paying for the illegal access of celebrity files,” Mrozek said. A lawyer for the Enquirer did not immediately return a call seeking comment. The Los Angeles Times first reported that UCLA employees pried into the medical records of prominent patients in April, resulting in six state public health investigation reports. Those reports found that a total of 1,041 patients had their records inappropriately accessed at UCLA medical facilities since 2003, and that 165 hospital employees – from doctors to orderlies – were disciplined through firings, suspensions and warnings. UCLA Health Systems issued a brief statement indicating the hospitals would continue to cooperate with authorities in patient privacy investigations but declined to comment on the Jackson case. Anthony Montero, a special assistant to the U.S. attorney, said another former UCLA Health Systems employee, Huping Zhou, was indicted Nov. 17 on suspicion of inappropriately accessing 71 celebrity medical records but is not accused of selling any information. Zhou is scheduled for arraignment this month. A man who identified himself over the telphone as Huping Zhou declined to talk to The Associated Press. (Daily Record)

MUSIC . . .

Britney Spears is taking her “Circus” act on the road. In an appearance on ABC’s “Good Morning America,” the pop star announced that her North American arena tour will open March 3 in New Orleans. Her new album, “Circus,” arrived Tuesday, on her 27th birthday. It is Spears’ first tour in five years as she gains career momentum and stability in her personal life. Spears, who sang her hit “Womanizer” on “GMA,” begins rehearsals next month. Spears’ 27-city itinerary includes Atlanta, Miami, Boston, Houston, Dallas, Minneapolis, Los Angeles and Las Vegas. She’ll close the tour April 28 in Chicago. She will jump to London for performances on June 3 and June 4. Tickets go on sale beginning Saturday. (Daily Record)

Britney Spears has announced dates for her upcoming Circus world tour. The Pussycat Dolls will open for Spears, who kicks off her first show March 3 in New Orleans (see a complete list below). She is also slated to perform to shows in London next June.  It is her first world tour since 2004’s Onyx Hotel Tour.
Spears’ dates:
Tue, 03/03/09
New Orleans Arena
New Orleans, LA
Thu, 03/05/09
Philips Arena
Atlanta, GA
Sat, 03/07/09
American Airlines Arena
Miami, FL
Sun, 03/08/09
St Pete Times Forum
Tampa, FL
Wed, 03/11/09
Nassau Coliseum
Uniondale, NY
Fri, 03/13/09
Prudential Center
Newark, NJ
Mon, 03/16/09
TD Banknorth Garden
Boston, MA
Tue, 03/24/09
Verizon Center
Washington, DC
Thu, 03/26/09
Mohegan Sun Arena
Uncasville, CT
Fri, 03/27/09
Mellon Arena
Pittsburgh, PA
Tue, 03/31/09
American Airlines Center
Dallas, TX
Fri, 04/03/09
Target Center
Minneapolis, MN
Thu, 04/09/09
Tacoma Dome
Tacoma, WA
Sat, 04/11/09
ARCO Arena
Sacramento, CA
Sun, 04/12/09
HP Pavilion At San Jose
San Jose, CA
Tue, 04/14/09
EnergySolutions Arena
Salt Lake City, UT
Thu, 04/16/09
STAPLES Center
Los Angeles, CA
Sun, 04/19/09
Honda Center
Anaheim, CA
Fri, 04/24/09
JOBING.COM ARENA
Glendale, AZ
Tue, 04/28/09
Allstate Arena
Rosemont, IL (US Weekly)

Live from the palace – Condi Rice on piano! U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice performed in a piano quintet Monday night for Queen Elizabeth II at Buckingham Palace. Rice played Brahms’ Op. 34 with British Foreign Secretary David Miliband’s wife, Louise, on violin, and three members of the London Symphony Orchestra. The queen gave Rice an audio recording of the performance as a gift. Rice is a classically trained pianist who had expressed a wish to play at the palace. She was making her final trip to Britain before President-elect Barack Obama takes office next month. On Tuesday, she gave a farewell speech to NATO foreign ministers in Brussels. (Daily Record)

Mannheim Steamroller news.  Mannheim Steamroller’s “The Christmas Angel” airs this Wednesday December 3rd at 10:00PM Central time on WGN America:
http://affiliate.zap2it.com/tvlistings/ZCProgram.do?method=getDetail&pgmId=SH005490310000&sch=1228359600000&stn=17098&chn=
Chip Davis spreads Holiday Cheer with “A Million Reasons to be Thankful”: http://www.americasupportsyou.mil/AmericaSupportsYou/Content.aspx?ID=44993489  (Mannheim News)

Britney Spears celebrated her 27th birthday Tuesday under the Big Top and before the TV cameras of Good Morning America. Dressed as a ringmaster, Spears made her entrance atop a circus wagon – accompanied by clowns, jugglers and performers dressed as circus animals. For her second number, “Womanizer,” Spears smashed through a fiery hoop. Afterwards, she announced that her concert tour would begin in New Orleans March 3. Then came the cake. The appearance, inside the Big Apple Circus tent within New York’s Lincoln Center, also marked the launch of Spears’s sixth studio album, Circus – her first CD since her 2007 comeback step, Blackout. Mother and Sons Attend As Spears announces on the title track (and delivered on GMA), “There are only two types of people in the world, the ones that entertain and the ones that observe.” GMA’s Robin Roberts called Spears’s appearance “our concert event of the year.” Claimed cohost Diane Sawyer about those gathered inside the circus tent, “There are about a gazillion people [here].” Among them: the pop star’s mother, Lynne Spears, and Britney’s two young sons, Preston and Jayden. Interspersed with the promos for Spears’s performance during Tuesday’s GMA were birthday greetings from the likes of Reese Witherspoon, John Travolta, Nicollette Sheridan, Teri Hatcher and PEOPLE’s newly named Sexiest Man Alive, Hugh Jackman – who sang “Happy Birthday” and blew her a kiss. “You look great,” Witherspoon relayed to Spears, “and I hope you have a great day.” Added Taylor Swift: “You have been officially awesome for 27 years.” On Sunday, Spears’s MTV special, Britney: For the Record, which documented some of her personal problems of the past year, was watched by more than 3.7 million viewers, according to the cable music network. Those are high numbers for MTV. (People)

Former American Idol contestant Michael Johns will release his latest song, “Another Christmas,” on iTunes Dec. 9 – and PEOPLE.com has an early listen. The Australian singer will donate proceeds from the song’s sale to fight Lou Gehrig’s disease. He credits his friendship with Access Hollywood’s Nancy O’Dell, whose mother Betty passed away in June after battling the disease, with raising his awareness of the illness and touching his heart. “Losing a family member to such a horrible disease is just so hard,” Johns said instatement. “It is a disease that is not often talked about and does not get anywhere near the funding it should.” Johns first wrote the song in 2006, and says it’s is about missing family over the holidays. “Not everyone can always get home,” he says. “This does not mean people don’t want to be there just sometimes life gets in the way. So, this is a song for them.” (People)

She has the voice of an angel! CLICK HERE to check out the enormously talented Kristin Chenoweth perform her rendition of the Christmas classic Do You Hear What I Hear?, off her new holiday CD, live on The View. Soooo pretty!  (Perez Hilton)

It’s a good thing that Kanye West is more into the “great art” of his new album – 808s and Heartbreak – rather than its sales, because industry insiders are predicting that when the numbers are tallied up, Kanye is gonna come in next tomorrow with only 425-475k in sales. That’s a big step down from Graduation’s nearly 1 million in first week sales! A 50% + step down! But hey, sometimes folks don’t recognize great art right away. (Perez Hilton)

It’s Christmas madness! George Michael has released a new holiday song! And, though it doesn’t top the Wham! classic Last Christmas, his new offering is quite pretty. (Perez Hilton)

The eighth Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival will be held June 11-14, 2009, on its usual site in Manchester, Tenn., an hour southeast of Nashville. The first round of ticket pre-sales begins Thursday (Dec. 4); a lineup announcement is expected early next year. The initial batch of tickets will be available for the first time as part of a payment plan, encompassing five installments of $50. Last month, Bonnaroo won the Top Festival honor at the Billboard Touring Awards for the fourth time. The event’s 2008 lineup featured Metallica, Pearl Jam, My Morning Jacket and Widespread Panic, among many others. (Billboard)

Neko Case will follow up 2006’s “Fox Confessor Brings the Flood,” the best-selling album of her career, with “Middle Cyclone,” due March 3 via Anti-. The 15-track collection boasts guest appearances from the Band’s Garth Hudson, fellow Canadian singer/songwriter Sarah Harmer, M. Ward and members of Case’s primary band the New Pornographers, Calexico, Los Lobos, Giant Sand, the Lilys and the Sadies. “Middle Cyclone” was produced by Case and Darryl Neudorf and put to tape in Tucson, Ariz., Brooklyn, N.Y., Toronto and Vermont. The album’s 12 originals are augmented by covers of Harry Nilsson’s “Don’t Forget Me” and Sparks’ “Never Turn Your Back on Mother Earth.” “Fox Confessor Brings the Flood” brought Case to a new level of commercial visibility, having sold 194,000 copies in the United States, according to Nielsen SoundScan. Here is the track listing for “Middle Cyclone”
“This Tornado Loves You”
“The Next Time You Say Forever”
“People Got a Lotta Nerve”
“Polar Nettles”
“Vengeance Is Sleeping”
“Never Turn Your Back on Mother Earth”
“Middle Cyclone”
“Fever”
“Magpie to the Morning”
“I’m An Animal”
“Prison Girls”
“Don’t Forget Me”
“The Pharaohs”
“Red Tide”
“Marais La Nuit” (Billboard)

Rosie Thomas is planning some Iron & Wine and soul for her next album. The Seattle indie rocker — currently on the road promoting her holiday offering, “A Very Rosie Christmas” — has enlisted pal Sam Beam to produce her follow-up to 2006’s “These Friends of Mine.” “We’ve been talking about doing it for a year,” Thomas tells Billboard.com. “I think it’s going to be different because we write different kinds of things. I’m just going to come up with a bunch of songs, and when I like them I’m going to give them to him and he’s going to start putting them together musically.” Thomas says that she intends “to move the rhythm up a bit … go for a more soul-filled feeling” on the new songs, which she says comes at the behest of Beam. “He was really pushing me for years; ‘I want you to write that Motown record you’ve always wanted to write,’” notes Thomas, who’s a Detroit native. “I just start laughing, ’cause it’s like, ‘Sam, look at you. You have a beard. How can I go to you to write this kind of stuff?’ But I know he has it in him. It’ll be fun, regardless.” Thomas says she’s written a few things already but plans to start working in earnest in the new year, when she goes to either New York, Los Angeles or Nashville to hunker down. “I tend to need to get away to write, get out of my comfort zone,” she explains. “That’s when I feel most creative.” Meanwhile, Thomas will be in the Christmas spirit for the next couple of weeks, with the tour wrapping Dec. 14 in Seattle. The shows feature music from the holiday album — including a pair of originals and an opening set by Thomas’ comic alter ego, Sheila Saputo. “It’s a lot of fun,” reports Thomas, who got married shortly after finishing “A Very Rosie Christmas.” “I’ve always loved to work on Christmas songs; growing up, every Christmas Eve we entertained the family that came over ’cause my parents were musicians. And I love Christmas records, so I thought ‘Why have I not done one yet to share with people I love outside of my family?’ I’ve had a blast doing this.” (Billboard)

As her song “Paper Planes” soars up the charts, rapper M.I.A. is preparing for the February arrival of her first child. Impending motherhood has already begun to mellow out the rapper, who was born Mathangi Arulpragasam. “When I sing, I have to be aware that someone can hear me inside,” she tells USA Today. “It’s really strange. I definitely feel less angry.” The rapper, 31, says she and her fiancé, the Exit frontman Benjamin Brewer, have not picked out baby names yet. “I need to see the baby and see who it is, what kind of personality it’ll have,” she says. “I need to give a name that is the character of the child. We’re quite relaxed about the whole thing.” So will the baby follow in the musical footsteps of mom and dad? “I think my baby is going to start off making club music,” she says. “That’s all I’ve been listening to. Of course, you never know….It might end up being an accountant.” And that would be just fine with her. “We actually don’t want our kid to do music,” says M.I.A. “So we’re going to buy it loads of instruments. . .so that it will completely rebel and go the other way.” (People)

Blockbuster Inc. will begin selling concert tickets at about 500 of its video rental stores, bolstering its effort to create a one-stop shop for entertainment. Under a three-year agreement announced Tuesday, Blockbuster’s stores next month will become the primary brick-and-mortar sales outlet for music concerts staged by promoter Live Nation Inc. in the United States. Dallas-based Blockbuster will supplant a hodgepodge of department stores, supermarkets and other retailers that Live Nation had been relying upon as part of an unraveling partnership with Ticketmaster Entertainment Inc. Beverly Hills-based Live Nation is breaking away from Ticketmaster to build its own ticketing channel. Ticketmaster will continue to handle some of Live Nation’s sales until contracts covering several concert venues expire. With most consumers buying their tickets online, Blockbuster is expected to account for less than 10 percent of the more than 10 million tickets that Live Nation anticipates selling in the United States next year. Still, the Live Nation relationship will provide Blockbuster with a new way to lure people into its stores as more consumers rent movies through DVD-by-mail vendors like Netflix Inc. or buy entertainment through Internet downloading services and “on-demand” features bundled into cable-television subscriptions. “This is another step in the right direction,” said James Keyes, Blockbuster’s chief executive. “It helps reinforce what Blockbuster really is trying to do – provide the most convenient access to entertainment and media.” Keyes, a former CEO for 7-Eleven Inc., has been trying to lessen Blockbuster’s dependence on in-store video rentals by emphasizing more sales of movies, games and DVD players. Last week, Blockbuster also expanded its digital business by unveiling a TV set-top box that stores video rentals piped over high-speed Internet connections. Now that it’s hooking up with Live Nation, Blockbuster hopes to piggyback on the ticket sales to peddle more CDs and licensed merchandise connected to the featured performers. Blockbuster will also get a slice of the transaction fee charged on the ticket sales. Blockbuster’s diversification has helped increase its store’s sales so far this year, although the company is still losing money – a factor that has further depressed its long-slumping stock. Blockbuster dropped 17 cents Monday to close at $1.02. Live Nation is faring better. The company earned $105.8 million on revenue of $3.25 billion through the first nine months of this year. But its shares dropped $1.05, or 21.5 percent, to $3.84 on Monday amid a broad market swoon. (Daily Record)

MOVIE . . .

Anne Hathaway’s family drama “Rachel Getting Married,” the border-smuggling tale “Frozen River” and the Deep South saga “Ballast” lead the nominees for the Spirit Awards with six nominations each, including best picture. Other best-picture nominees announced Tuesday: Michelle Williams’ down-on-her-luck drama, “Wendy and Lucy,” and Mickey Rourke’s broken-down athlete tale “The Wrestler.” Hathaway and Williams have lead-actress nominations, along with Melissa Leo for “Frozen River,” Summer Bishil for “Towelhead” and Tarra Riggs for “Ballast.” Rourke has a best-actor nomination, along with Javier Bardem for “Vicky Cristina Barcelona,” Richard Jenkins for “The Visitor,” Sean Penn for “Milk” and Jeremy Renner for “The Hurt Locker.” The awards honor independent film. (Daily Record)

Darnell Martin could have made an entire movie about Muddy Waters. Or Etta James. Or Chuck Berry. Instead, the writer-director has made a movie about all of them with “Cadillac Records,” cramming their complicated individual stories into the larger saga of Chicago-based Chess Records, the label that launched those stars and so many others during the 1950s and ’60s. The result feels even more cursory and rushed than the average music biopic, a genre that’s already difficult to depict without lapsing into self-parody. (Jake Kasdan, Judd Apatow and Co. had long known that when they made “Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story.”) It’s all here, over and over, just as you’ve seen it countless times before: the early struggle, the rise to the top (accompanied by the obligatory montage of press clippings and positions on the Billboard chart), the waste of fame and talent with various controlled substances. Certainly there must be a better, fresher way to tell this familiar tale. Despite the glimmers of potential for typically strong work from Jeffrey Wright as Waters, Mos Def as Berry and Adrien Brody as the label’s founder, Polish emigre Leonard Chess, Martin too often gives them too little of substance with which to work. She also shows us the racism of the time – which Chess earnestly, persistently tries to break through by bringing blues and R&B to a mass audience – with facile platitudes and hand-holding voiceover provided by Cedric the Entertainer. As songwriter Willie Dixon, Cedric tells us things that are already obvious, things we’re already seeing for ourselves: that these performers were hooked on music, women and cars (namely Cadillacs, hence the title), on the flashy lifestyle talent and stardom afforded them. Columbus Short gets some amusing moments as volatile harmonica player Little Walter, but Gabrielle Union gets too little to do as Waters’ initially supportive but ultimately put-upon wife (yet another cliché in this type of movie, for those of you keeping score at home). And Beyoncé Knowles doesn’t seem to have splurged on acting lessons since her wooden turn in “Dreamgirls.” From the second she enters the film as the tempestuous James, you want to see her sing “At Last,” then get out. No amount of wigs and padding can transform her. The music itself is the most reliable star of all; Knowles does knock it out of the park a couple times, particularly on James’ signature song, and Mos Def is insanely charismatic as Berry, though he doesn’t appear in the film nearly as much as the ads would lead you to believe and when he’s gone you want him to come back. In fact, the music is often so good, with classics including Waters’ “Hoochie Coochie Man” and Berry’s “No Particular Place to Go,” that “Cadillac Records” makes you long for a documentary on the subject instead. That probably wasn’t the intended effect. “Cadillac Records,” a Sony Music Film release, is rated R for pervasive language and some sexuality. Running time: 107 minutes. Two stars out of four. (Daily Record)

For his next big-screen project, Shia LaBeouf is sticking with what he knows—or at least, what he has come to know via a few high-profile, rather embarrassing incidents—the legal system. In a nice change of pace, this time around the actor will be the one in the right, signing on to star in the latest cash cow adaptation of a John Grisham novel, The Associate. According to Variety, LaBeouf will play a fresh graduate of Yale Law School who is manipulated into accepting a job at a prestigious law firm and who soon becomes privy to inside information about a billion-dollar lawsuit. In other words, every Grisham book ever written. (Eonline)

Hunter Parrish, one of the stars of the Broadway musical “Spring Awakening,” has joined the cast of Michelle and Kieran Mulroney’s “Paper Man.” The coming-of-middle-age comedy chronicles the unlikely friendship between a failed author (Jeff Daniels) and a Long Island high school girl (Emma Stone) who teaches him about growing up, all under the disapproving eye of his long-suffering wife and imaginary superhero friend. Parrish will play the girl’s 18-year-old working-class boyfriend. The cast also includes Ryan Reynolds and Lisa Kudrow. Producing are FilmColony’s Richard Gladstein; Guymon Casady of Film 360, the film production arm of Management 360; and Artfire’s Art Spigel and Ara Katz. Production began last week in New York. Parrish, repped by Endeavor and Management 360, is onstage as Melchior in “Spring Awakening,” which last year won the Tony for best musical. Onscreen, he will appear opposite Zac Efron in “17 Again” and stars on Showtime’s “Weeds.” (Hollywood Reporter)

With six nominations each, “Ballast,” a drama about survival in the Mississippi Delta, “Frozen River,” a portrait of two single moms on the Canadian border, and “Rachel Getting Married,” the account of a dysfunctional family wedding, led the nominees for Film Independent’s Spirit Awards, announced Tuesday morning. All three films were nominated for best feature along “Wendy and Lucy” and “The Wrestler.” Charlie Kaufman’s “Synecdoche, New York,” a twisty, M.C. Escher-like film, was singled out as the winner of the group’s Robert Altman Award, give to one film’s director, casting director and ensemble cast. Kaufman will share the award with casting director Jeanne McCarthy and his actors Hope Davis, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Catherine Keener, Samantha Morton, Tom Noonan, Emily Watson, Dianne Wiest, and Michelle Williams when the Spirit Awards are handed out Feb. 21. “Synecdoche” also figure in the best first feature lineup, along with Antonio Campos’ “Afterschool,” Barry Jenkins’ “Medicine for Melancholy,” Christopher Zalla’s “Sangre De Mi Sangre” and Alex Rivera’s “Sleep Dealer.” The actresses who will compete for best female lead include Summer Bishil (“Towelhead”), Anne Hathaway (“Rachel”), Melissa Leo (“River”), Tarra Riggs (“Ballast”) and Michelle Williams (“Wendy and Lucy”). The actors in the best male lead category are Javier Bardem (“Vicky Cristina Barcelona”), Richard Jenkins (“The Visitor”), Sean Penn (“Milk”), Jeremy Renner (“The Hurt Locker”) and Mickey Rourke (“The Wrestler”). “Rachel” also scored two nominations in the supporting female category for Rosemarie De Witt and Debra Winger. Also nominated are Penelope Cruz (“Vicky”), Rosie Perez (“The Take”) and Misty Upham (“River”). Nominated for best supporting male are James Franco (“Milk”), Anthony Mackie (“The Hurt Locker”), Charlie McDermott (“River”), JimMyron Ross (“Ballast”) and Haaz Sleiman (“Visitor”). When it came to best director, the nominations mixed it up a bit. Of the five best feature nominees, “Rachel’s” Jonathan Demme, “Ballast’s” Lance Hammer and “River’s” Courtney Hunt all earned nominations. But “Wendy’s” Kelly Reichardt and “Wrestler’s” Darren Aronofksy didn’t make the cut. Instead, the nominations embraced Ramin Bahrani, who directed “Chop Shop,” and Tom McCarthy, who directed “The Visitor.” Hammer and Hunt were also nominated for best first screenplay, along with Dustin Lance Black (“Milk”), Jonathan Levine (“The Wackness”) and Jenny Lumet (“Rachel”). Woody Allen will be invited to visit the awards, which take place in a tent on the beach in Santa Monica, since he was nominated for his “Vicky Christina Barcelona” screenplay. His fellow nominees in the screenplay category are Anna Boden & Ryan Fleck (“Sugar”), Kaufman (“Synecdoche”), Howard A. Rodman (“Savage Grace”) and Christopher Zalla (“Sangre De Mi Sangre”). Cited for their cinematography are Maryse Alberti (“Wrester), Lol Crawley (“Ballast”), James Laxton (“Medicine for Melancholy”), Harris Savides (“Milk”) and Michael Simmonds (“Chop Suey”). The Spirits handed out nominations for best foreign film to Laurent Cantet’s “The Class” from France, Matteo Garrone’s “Gomorra” (Italy), Steve McQueen’s “Hunger” (U.K./Ireland), Abdellatif Kechiche’s “Secret of the Grain” (France) and Carols Reygadas’ “Silent Light” (Mexico/France/Netherlands/Germany). The most obvious omission was the Mumbai-set “Slumdog Millionaire,” one of the critical hits of the season. The documentary nominees are “The Betrayal,” directed by Ellen Kuras & Thavisouk Phrasavath; “Encounters at the End of the World,” Werner Herzog; “Man on Wire,” James Marsh; “The Order of Myths,” Margaret Brown, and “Up the Yangtze,” Yung Chang. Nominees for the John Cassavetes Award, given to the best first feature made for under $500,000 are “In Search of a Midnight Kiss,” “Prince of Broadway,” “The Signal,” “Take Out” and “Turn the River.” The winner of the Acura Someone to Watch Award, given to a filmmaker who has not yet received “appropriate recognation” will be chosen from among directors Barry Jenkins (“Medicine for Melancholy”), Nina Paley (“Sita Sings the Blues”) and Lynn Shelton (“My Effortless Brilliance”). Nominated for the Lacoste Truer Than Fiction Award given to an emerging director of non-fiction films are Brown (“The Order of Myths”), Sacha Gerevasi (“Anvil! The Story of Anvil”) and Darius Marder (“Loot”). Nominees for the Piaget Producers Award are Lars Knudsen and Jay Van Hoy, producers of “Treeless Mountain” and “I’ll Come Running”; Jason Orans, producer of “Goodbye Solo” and “Year of the Fish,” and Heather Rae, producer of “River” and “Ibid.” Among distributors, Sony Pictures Classics easily outpaced the competition by picking up 18 nominations and fielding two of the best feature nominees, “River” and “Rachel.” IFC Films followed with 11 nominations. Jason Bateman and Sandra Oh announced the nominations at the Sofitel L.A. hotel.
A list of nominees follows:

Best feature
“Ballast”
“Frozen River”
“Rachel Getting Married”
“Wendy and Lucy”
“The Wrestler”

Best director
Ramin Bahrani, “Chop Shop”
Jonathan Demme, “Rachel Getting Married”
Lance Hammer, “Ballast”
Courtney Hunt, “Frozen River”
Tom McCarthy, “The Visitor”

Best first feature
“Afterschool”
“Medicine for Melancholy”
“Sangre De Mi Sangre”
“Sleep Dealer”
“Synecdoche, New York”

Best screenplay
Woody Allen, “Vicky Cristina Barcelona”
Anna Boden & Ryan Fleck, “Sugar”
Charlie Kaufman, “Synecdoche, New York”
Howard A. Rodman, “Savage Grace”
Christopher Zalla, “Sangre De Mi Sangre”

Best female lead
Summer Bishil, “Towelhead”
Anne Hathaway, “Rachel Getting Married”
Melissa Leo, “Frozen River”
Tarra Riggs, “Ballast”
Michelle Williams, “Wendy and Lucy”

Best male lead
Javier Bardem, “Vicky Cristina Barcelona”
Richard Jenkins, “The Visitor”
Sean Penn, “Milk”
Jeremy Renner, “The Hurt Locker”
Mickey Rourke, “The Wrestler”

Best supporting female
Penelope Cruz, “Vicky Cristina Barcelona”
Rosemarie DeWitt, “Rachel Getting Married”
Rosie Perez, “The Take”
Misty Upham, “Frozen River”
Debra Winger, “Rachel Getting Married”

Best supporting male
James Franco, “Milk”
Anthony Mackie, “The Hurt Locker”
Charlie McDermott, “Frozen River”
JimMyron Ross, “Ballast”
Haaz Sleiman, “The Visitor”

Best cinematography
Maryse Alberti, “The Wrestler”
Lol Crawley, “Ballast”
James Laxton, “Medicine for Melancholy”
Harris Savides, “Milk”
Michael Simmonds, “Chop Shop”

Best documentary
“The Betrayal”
“Encounters at the End of the World”
“Man on Wire”
“The Order of Myths”
“Up the Yangtze”

Best foreign film
“The Class” (France)
“Gomorra” (Italy)
“Hunger” (U.K./Ireland)
“Secret of the Grain” (France)
“Silent Light” (Mexico/France/Netherlands/Germany)

Robert Altman Award
“Synecdoche, New York” (Hollywood Reporter)

TV . . .

Brad Pitt has some strong words for the paparazzi. In an interview on NBC’s “Today” show, Pitt said: “Let me be very blunt: I hate them. I hate these people. I don’t understand … that they do that for a living.” Pitt said there should be laws against celebrity photographers who “climb over your walls wearing camouflage and calling out your kids’ names as you’re trying to take them to school.” The actor appeared Tuesday to talk about his humanitarian work in New Orleans, but the conversation turned to his famous family. Pitt said he doesn’t like talking about Angelina Jolie and their six children. Said Pitt: “It seems to get cheapened somehow as it goes through the filters and the airwaves – and some things you just want to keep close to the chest.” (Daily Record)

Britney Spears banned the judges from her dressing room during her recent X Factor appearance. Simon Cowell and his fellow X Factor judges were banned from entering Britney Spears’ dressing room when she appeared on the talent show this weekend, sources have told the Sun. Insiders say the 26-year-old was accompanied to the TV studios by a huge entourage for Saturday’s taping who stopped the judges dropping in to say hello. “You have never seen so many heavies. Even [the area] around the judges’ dressing rooms was sealed off by Britney’s security people. When the judges went to meet her, her security wouldn’t let anyone past,” a source told the paper before claiming Britney hadn’t watched the contestant’s performances. “Everyone was stunned she admitted that she hadn’t watched the show. There’s a TV in the dressing room.” (Handbag)

Scrubs gets a new network and a sexy new chief of medicine – Courteney Cox Arquette – and PEOPLE has the first-look photo. The long-running NBC comedy is now on ABC, with the Friend-turned-MD appearing in the season-eight premiere on Jan. 6 as Dr. Maddox in the first of three episodes. Also look for her onetime costar Matthew Perry to show up on Scrubs later in the season. (People)

An NBC News executive says the network is close to naming chief White House correspondent David Gregory as Tim Russert’s replacement on the top-ranked Sunday political talk show “Meet the Press.” Gregory is negotiating terms of a deal that would give him the job, said the NBC News executive, who spoke on condition of anonymity because the deal wasn’t final. Gregory has been considered one of the leading candidates for the job since Russert died last June. Tom Brokaw has filled in since then, and is interviewing President-elect Barack Obama on Sunday’s show. The Huffington Post had earlier reported Gregory was the selection, to which NBC News spokeswoman Allison Gollust said, “We have nothing to announce. Just because the Huffington Post says something doesn’t make it true.” (Daily Record)

The future of soap operas is looking like a slippery slope!!! Susan Lucci and the rest of the All My Children crew have taken a dramatic reduction in pay. This is after NBC’s Days of Our Lives axed longtime cast members Deirdre Hall and Drake Hogestyn, and cut everyone’s pay by about 40% to keep the show on the air through 2010.  Hall’s character had been on the show for 32 years! Talk about no job security! Soap audiences are down by a lot, averaging only about 2.6 million viewers a day. At one point there were as many as 12 different soaps on the air, but that number has fallen to 8. No word on how much of a pay cut Susan is taking, but….she’s still probably way overpayed! (Perez Hilton)

As Battlestar Galactica begins the countdown to its series finale, there is new life in the franchise! Sci Fi Channel announced today that it’s picking up Caprica, the spinoff series set 50 years before the Cylon attack that sent the ragtag fleet on its mission to Earth. The series is a family drama about the Adamas (as in Admiral Bill and Major Lee Adama) and the Graystones, during the era when computer engineers were brainstorming the first Cylon technology. The series stars Esai Morales as Bill Adama’s father Joseph; Eric Stoltz and Paula Malcolmson as wealthy capitalists Daniel and Amanda Graystone, parents to Zoe Graystone (Alessandra Torresani); and Polly Walker as the imperious headmistress at Zoe Graystone’s school. But how many episodes of life in the pre-apocalypse Twelve Colonies will we get? And when does the show premiere? (Eonline)

Courtney B. Vance and Jack Davenport are the first actors cast in ABC’s hot drama pilot “Flash Forward,” which is rumored as a potential companion to “Lost.” “Flash Forward,” from David S. Goyer, Brannon Braga and ABC Studios, is based on Robert J. Sawyer’s sci-fi novel and chronicles the chaos that ensues after everyone in the world blacks out for 2 minutes and 17 seconds and has a mysterious vision of the future that changes lives forever. Vance will play Stan Wedeck, the Los Angeles bureau chief of the FBI. Davenport will play Lloyd Simcoe, who is trapped in Northern California when the event occurs and struggles to reach his son in a Southland hospital. “Flash Forward,” which has a pilot order with a series penalty behind it, will be directed by Goyer. He is executive producing with Braga, Jessika Borsiczky Goyer, Vince Gerardis and Ralph M. Vicinanza.  For six seasons, Vance played assistant district attorney Ron Carver on NBC’s “Law & Order: Criminal Intent.” Vance and his wife, actress Angela Bassett, also are shepherding several projects through their Bassett/Vance Prods., including “Erasure,” a feature adaptation of Percival Everett’s novel penned by Dwayne Johnson-Cochran. He is repped by Lighthouse Entertainment and attorney Darrell Miller. British native Davenport, who played Norrington in the three “Pirates of the Caribbean” movies, most recently starred on CBS’ period drama “Swingtown.” The actor, who next appears in the feature “The Boat That Rocked,” is repped by CAA, Sanders Armstrong Management and his U.K. agent, Christian Hodell. (Hollywood Reporter)

CBS has picked up Jerry Bruckheimer’s procedural thriller “Eleventh Hour” for five more episodes, the network confirmed. (Hollywood Reporter)

TODAY’S IMPOSSIBLE QUESTION . . .  (Mike Butts Creative)

Q.  If you do THIS at work you can decrease your stress by 17%. Do what?
    A.  Chew gum!!

TODAY’S QUOTE (By Andrew Lang)

“LIFE’S MORE AMUSING THAN WE THOUGHT.”

MIND BOGGLERS . . .  (QuickTrivia)

Q.  In 2000, how did Darva Conger get in the news?
    A.  Won a million dollars from Regis Philbin
    B.  Won CBS’s “Big Brother” game
    C.  Wanted to marry a multi-millionaire  ****
    D.  Was the first “Survivor” voted off the island

Q.  In 1969, John Lennon married who?
    A.  Linda Eastman
    B.  Janice Stiles
    C.  Linda Lovitch
    D.  Yoko Ono  ****

Q.  Beatles lyrics: Newspaper taxis appear on the shore, waiting to?
    A.  Pick up a fare
    B.  Take you away  ****
    C.  Fold into birds
    D.  Fly to the moon

Q.  In the movie “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs,” what do the Dwarves mine?
    A.  Pearls
    B.  Coal
    C.  Diamonds  ****
    D.  Gold

Q.  Movie in which Gary Oldman hunts down a one-armed female Russian assassin?
    A.  Romeo Must Die
    B.  A Room For Romeo Brass
    C.  Romeo Is Bleeding  ****
    D.  Romeo and Juliet

Q.  According to Communist American writer John Reed, how many days shook the world?
    A.  Twelve
    B.  Ten  ****
    C.  Six
    D.  Two

TRAVEL TIPS . . . (Peter Greenberg Worldwide)

WORKING UP AN APPETITE FOR YOUR CULINARY VACATION:

The problem with culinary tourism is that you can come back 10 pounds heavier than when you left. But I’ve got some food vacations that make you burn calories before your gourmet experience. The Lake Austin Spa Resort offers a Culinary Experience week that includes a fat-burning boating and hiking adventure followed by a breakfast cookout. The spa also offers a several group exercise and cooking classes that you can mix and match to your tastes. Bike Riders offers culinary biking adventures in regions like Italy, France, and Spain. Professional chefs travel with you throughout the eight-day tour, teaching you about wine and cheese as you huff and puff your way through the countryside. The company Cooking in Crete has an 11-mile guided culinary hike through Crete, where you will tour fish markets and olive groves, and walk along white-sand beaches before enjoying a leisurely gourmet meal.

(Peter Greenberg is North America’s preeminent expert on Travel. An Emmy Award-Winning writer and producer, Peter is the Travel Editor for NBC’S “TODAY SHOW,” MSNBC and CNBC. A Best-Selling author of the “Travel Detective” series and host of the nationally syndicated “Peter Greenberg Worldwide Radio Show.” Visit WWW.PETERGREENBERGWORLDWIDE.COM to learn more about Peter Greenberg and his adventures.)

MIKE BUTTS CREATIVE . . .

THE ITALIAN ELBOW /JOKE: J

AN ITALIAN GRANDMOTHER IS ON THE PHONE GIVING DIRECTIONS TO HER GRANDSON WHO IS COMING OVER TO HER HOUSE FOR A VISIT—SHE
SAYS: YOU COMMA DE FRONT DOOR OF THE APARTMENTA—I AM INNA APARTMENTA 301—

THERE ISSA  BIGGA PANEL AT THE FRONT DOOR—WITH YOUR ELBOW YOU PUSHA BUTTON 301—COME INSIDE—ELEVATOR ISSA ONNA YOUR RIGHTA.

WITH YOUR ELBOW YOU PUSHA 3..WHENNA YOU GETTA OUT..I’MMA ONNA DA LEFT..WITH YOUR ELBOW YOU HITTA MY DOORBELL.

THE KID SAYS THAT SOUNDS EASY BUT WHY AM I HITTING ALL THESE BUTTONS WITH MY ELBOW?

SHE SAYS..WHAT? YOU COMMA EMPTY-HANDED??

DALAI LAMA SAYS NO SEX!

THE DALAI LAMA SAID THE OTHER DAY THAT SEX ONLY COMPLICATES LIFE AND NO SEX OFFERS MORE FREEDOM. YOU SEE THIS IS WHAT LIVING
IN HIGH ALTITUDES DOES TO YOU! I’LL TAKE MY CHANCES J

BIRTHDAYS . . .

—1903  Guitarist and composer Carlos Montoya (d. 3-3-1993)
—1921  Opera Singer Phyllis Curtin
—1924  Actor Jim Backus (“Mr. Howell” Gilligan’s Island) (d. 7-3-1989)
—1925  Singer Ferlin Husky (“Wings Of A Dove”)
—1927  Singer Andy Williams (“Moon River”)
—1930  Director Jean Luc Godard (Breathless)
—1932  Comedian Jaye P. Morgan (The Gong Show)
⎯1943  Singer Mike Smith (Dave Clark Five) (d. 2-28-2008)
—1948  Musician Ozzy Osbourne (Black Sabbath) (“War Pigs”)
—1949  Singer Mickey Thomas (The Elvin Bishop Band) (“Fooled Around and Fell In Love”)
—1951  Auto Racer Rick Mears
—1952  Musician Don Barnes (.38 Special)
—1954  Musician Paul Gregg (Restless Heart)
—1954  Musician Steve Forbert (Romeo’s Tune)
—1961  Actress Daryl Hannah (Roxanne)
⎯1961  Actress Julianne Moore (Laws of Attraction)
—1968  Actor Brendan Fraser (George Of  The Jungle)
⎯1974  Actor Bruno Campos (Nip/Tuck)
—1980  Actress Anna Chlumsky (Miracle on 42nd Street)
—1981  Actor Brian Bonsall (Family Ties)

THIS DAY IN HISTORY . . .

ROCKEFELLER CENTER CHRISTMAS TREE LIGHTING (1st tree lighting in 1933) AL ROKER (The Today Show) will be hosting the event.
—1818  Illinois became the 21st state. The state capital is Springfield, the state flower is native violet.
—1833  America’s first co-educational institution of higher learning, Ohio’s Oberlin College, opened its doors with a total enrollment of 29 men and 15 women.
—1894  Poet/author Robert Louis Stevenson, born 11-13-1850, (Treasure Island, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde) died at the age of 44. On a hilltop in Samoa, where he had moved because of tuberculosis, his epitaph reads, “Here lies where he longed to be . . . Home is the sailor, home from the sea . . . And the hunter home from the hill.”
—1931  Alka Seltzer makes it fizzy debut.
—1965  The Beatles release the single “Day Tripper” and the album “Rubber Soul.”
—1967  Barbra Streisand’s “Color Me Barbra” television special becomes one of the first color programs aired on the BBC.
—1967  Dr. Christian Barnard of South Africa performed the first successful heart transplant operation. The patient lived for eighteen days.
—1968  Elvis makes his first live appearance in seven years when he tapes an NBC-TV variety show. (His black outfit is on display at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland).
—1971  Switzerland’s Montreux Casino burns down while the Mothers Of Invention are performing. Incident prompts opening act Deep Purple to write “Smoke On The Water.”
—1972  Soon after takeoff from Santa Cruz, Tenerife, one of the Canary Islands, a Spantax Convair 990-A Coronado plane carrying mostly German nationals crashed. Of the 155 passengers and crew aboard, only one woman survived the impact of the crash, but she died of her injuries later that day.
—1976  In Oakland, fans scream for Jackson Browne to “Get Loose” and he responds by dropping his pants.
—1977  The top single in Britain is Wings’ “Mull Of Kintyre.”
—1979  Eleven were killed and 28 injured as thousands of fans struggled to find seating where festival seating arrangements were used at Cincinnati’s Riverfront Stadium for a Who concert. The incident is dramatized in an episode of “WKRP in Cincinnati.”
—1984  A cloud of toxic gas spewed forth from storage tank #610 at the Union Carbide factory in Bhopal, India. Two thousand die and 300,000 more suffered injuries.
⎯1991  Hulk Hogan defeats the Undertaker to become 4th time WWF Champion.

RADIO ONLINE® DAILY SHOW PREP™ . . .

ON THIS DAY
On this date in 1621, Galileo invented the telescope. It was also the same day that all of Galileo’s neighbors went out and got curtains.
In 1828, Andrew Jackson was elected President of the United States. He said, “My only hope is that I can be a good enough president that, some day, you’ll put me on the $20 bill” and the rest, as they say, is history.
TODAY IS
Only 22 shopping days left.
Brian Bonsall, that cute little kid from “Family Ties,” turns 27 today. 27? Oh, my… it’s 2008! TV Land had us convinced it was 1984.
Brendan Fraser turns 40 today. You gotta admire a guy who’s 40 and still close to his mummy.
Figure skater Katarina Witt hits 43 today. “Years old,” I’m pretty sure, not “proof.”
Paul Nicholas, who starred in “Heaven on the 7th Floor,” turns 63 today. These days, he’s taking the elevator.
THIS WEEK IS
National Hand Washing Awareness Week — December 1-7. A phoner that worked for us was talking about washing hands. Studies say that frequent hand washing greatly reduces your chances of getting sick as often. Doctors recommend washing your hands before meals with warm soap and water for about as long as it takes to sing “Happy Birthday.” Calls ranged from disgusting stories to those at the other end of the spectrum who are super-anal about germs. You won’t believe some of the rituals some people go through.
(Family Circle) Public bathrooms are cleaned fairly often, so while you’re wise to use your hip to push open stall doors and paper towels to manage handles and knobs, you’re more likely to pick up the sniffles from other places in your daily travels. Pull out your handy antibacterial wipes when you’re:
•    At the grocery store. How often do you think shopping cart handles are cleaned? Think how often they’re used.
•    Using cashier pens. Pens provided to sign credit card purchases are superb carriers of cold viruses. That goes for pens in doctors’ offices, at banks, and by delivery people. So carry your own pen.
•    At ATM and in the elevator. Press all buttons with a finger or knuckle that you’re unlikely to use to touch your eyes, nose or mouth. Better yet, use a key or a pen you carry with you.
•    Washing your hands. Unless the liquid hand soap in public bathroom is in its own sealed bag, it’s likely a breeding fiesta for bacteria. Rinse well with warm water and use your own hand sanitizer.
Pushing an elevator button is more likely to make you sick than kissing your under the weather husband. Why? If someone sneezes into his hand before hitting the button, the virus ridden fluid from his nose awaits you. Saliva, however, contains little, if any, cold viruses, explains Dr. Neil Schachter, M.D., professor of pulmonary medicine at Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York City and author of “The Good Doctor’s Guild to Colds and Flu.”
Woman’s Day offers these stats on colds and flu.
•    200 plus cold viruses exist
•    3 to 8 colds is the average number a child will get in a year
•    93mph is the rate at which air particles travel out of your nose and mouth when you sneeze
•    3 feet is the distance droplets can travel from a cough or sneeze
•    5 minutes is the time germs can live on hands
•    1 to 2 days is how long cold germs can live on hard surfaces like doorknobs pens, and phones
•    8 to 12 hours is how long a cold virus remains on cloth, tissue and paper
•    30 seconds is how long you should scrub your hands to kill germs
THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW
•    President-Elect Barack Obama is giving his wife a $30,000 ring to show his appreciation for her support during his presidential campaign, a ring she’ll have on her hand by inauguration day. The Harmony ring is made of rhodium – the world’s most expensive metal — and encrusted with diamonds.
•    Lance Armstrong says he’ll be back racing at the Tour de France next year.
•    A juror was AWOL for the murder trial of a former “Sopranos” actor on Monday. He was arrested during the weekend after allegedly punching his 15-year-old stepson in the face.
•    Yes, economic times are tough. But video game sales this Christmas are still expected to exceed a 15% increase over last year.
•    Mariah Carey’s husband has given her an early Christmas present: a $1.5 million ski chalet in Aspen, Colorado.
•    The FDA is about to approve a new sweetener, made naturally from the Stevia shrub out of South America… although China actually grows 80% of the world’s Stevia. No chemicals, zero calories.
•    Keith Urban is going to tour again next year, hitting the road in May. Supporting acts will include Taylor Swift, Sugarland and Dierks Bentley.
•    The number one topic for Yahoo searches this year and seven of the last eight years? Britney Spears.
•    CBS has picked up “Eleventh Hour” for five more episodes.
•    If Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer ever do get married, he’ll bake their wedding cake. He fancies himself quite the baker.
•    After nearly 20 years of marriage, “CSI” star Marg Helgenberger has separated from her husband.
•    Mario Lopez will again host the Miss America pageant January 24th in Las Vegas.
•    Ivana Trump and her fourth husband are calling it quits after just getting married in April.
•    That scar on Tina Fey’s left cheek is leftover from an incident when she was five years old and a stranger slashed her cheek.
•    If you haven’t seen Ricki Lake lately, she’s dropped 140 pounds. In her words, “Not skinny by Hollywood standards,” but she’s looking great.
•    This year, the cost of the full 12 days of Christmas is $86,609. Of course, that’s not including tax and tip.
•    Cosmopolitan magazine reports the more a guy’s eyes dilate, the better he looks to you.
•    28 North American concert dates for Madonna grossed $91.5 million.
•    Courtney Cox is going to guest star when “Scrubs” returns to a new network, ABC, on January 6th. Another “Friend,” Matthew Perry, will guest star later in the season.
CONVERSATION STARTERS
This holiday season, the must-have gift is not a toy, doll or video game console, it’s cash! It gives a whole new meaning to the oft-repeated Wall Street phrase, “Cash is king.” For the 2008 holiday season, extravagance is out and economical is in. According to two surveys conducted eight weeks apart by Western Union, consumers say that cash is by far the gift of choice and the more practical option this holiday season. Survey results show:
•    65% of Americans would prefer to receive $100 in cash, instead of a specific present or a gift card of the same value. This result is up nine points from Western Union’s first survey, fielded in mid-September.
•    More than half (53%) of those who would prefer cash would use that money on basic living expenses such as gas, groceries and bills. Only 14% would spend it on a treat for themselves.
•    79% of Americans believe cash is a good gift because people can use it to get what they really want.
Physical intimacy is good for your health. Researchers followed 51 working couples for one week, collecting detailed records of their activities, moods and stress hormone levels. The more physical affection couples had in a given day, the lower their stress hormone levels and the better their moods. This was especially true of couples who reported problems at work. Couples did not necessarily have to have sex to get the health benefits, said the researchers. Dr. Beate Ditzen, who headed the University of Zurich study, says “intimacy” means different things to different couples to some it is sex, to others it is an affectionate touch. “All kinds of behavior which couples themselves would consider intimate might be beneficial.” (National Enquirer)
When a guy is into you, he’ll do anything to catch your attention, and that includes charming your crew. “Men innocently flirt with other girls to demonstrate to you that they’re desirable,” says Scott Kudia, Ph.D., author of “If This Is Love, Why Am I Unhappy?” Plus, dudes are hardwired to seek approval from women, so they may not realize they’re doing it. But if you’re concerned his behavior hints at a predisposition to being unfaithful, pay attention to whether he talks to cone chick or many. If he’s chatting up several girls in the crowd, he’s probably just seeking attention. Zeroing in on one girl could indicate that his intent isn’t so innocuous. (Cosmopolitan)
The honor of the most hated Christmas song of all time goes to “Jingle Bells,” as performed by the Singing Dogs, a 1955 Danish record that was reedited and released in 1971. That’s the word from Edison Media Research and Pinnacle Media Worldwide who independently of each other surveyed radio listeners to find out the holiday songs they most loved and hated–and came up with the same answer. The songs we love the most are:
•    Bing Crosby’s “White Christmas” (1942)
•    Nat King Cole’s “The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire)” (1946)
•    Burl Ives’s “A Holly Jolly Christmas” (1965)
•    “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” (Brenda Lee, 1958)
•    “Jingle Bell Rock” (Bobby Helms, 1957)
•    “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” (John Lennon and Yoko Ono, 1971)
Music can make your heart soar, says researchers. Ten men and women spent 30 minutes listening to music they selected and enjoyed, and another half hour listening to anxiety producing tunes while their blood vessel function was measured. Blood vessel diameter expanded 26 percent when the volunteers listened to their favorite music but narrowed by 6 percent while listening to music that caused anxiety. A wider vessel means blood flows more smoothly with less likelihood of heart attack or stroke. “These results were music to my ears,” says Dr. Michael Miller, who headed the University of Maryland Medical Center study. “They signal another preventive strategy that we may incorporate in our daily lives to promote heart health.” (National Enquirer)
PHONE TOPICS
•    How many cameras do you own?
•    What do you do with all the pictures you take?
•    Driving school horror stories?
•    Who pays for a gym membership and never uses it?
•    Where do you book the lowest airfare?
•    Online dating horror stories?
•    Which year of your life would you like to do over?
•    What food do you love that “hates” you?
•    What turns you on that doesn’t turn most people on?
•    Have you ever been paid off to keep a secret?
•    Mistakes that men constantly make? Mistakes that women constantly make?
•    Where do you go when you want to get cheered up?
•    How much walking-around-money do you like to have on you?
•    What do you still have from your childhood?
•    What’s the #1 thing on the top of your Christmas wish list?
My wife and I talked recently about not getting each other Christmas gifts. We agreed on just buying for our kids this year, since we’re hurting financially. I worry though that she’ll still get me something. Even when you agree with someone that you’re not going to buy each other gifts, is it a solid agreement? Should you buy a gift “just in case” they get you one? What should I do?
I always joke with my mom, that she is the reason that I’m fat today. She once told me, that when she was pregnant, she used to eat cannolis every day at a local bakery. So, I figured, it was because my mom got me hooked on sweets early in life. And now, I have the research to prove it! A UK Professor, David Benton said recently that what a mom-to-be eats during the three months before birth has a major formative role in the brain functioning of a child. See! Phoner: Do you think it matters what kind of foods a pregnant woman eats? Does it really have any affect? Is it true that you are what your mother eats?
Here’s a fun phoner: What do you not have any luck with? For me, it’s tires on my car. I had a flat about a month ago, and now I have another one! This is my third of the year. I can’t win with tires. We had lots of people call up and answer the question for themselves, “I never have any luck with _____!”
What’s the secret in simply eating a meal together? Researchers say that family dinners and the communication that occurs over the course of a meal are critical in building a relationship with your children and to understanding the world in which they live. Anyone never eat dinner at the table as a family? Are you still close with your kids?
Every hour we fall behind is considered an hour of sleep debt, and Americans accumulate about two full weeks of personal sleep debt a year. Who do you know that sleeps the least? The most? How much sleep do you need to feel good in the morning?
Only one-fourth of Americans who search the Internet for health advice regularly check the source and date of the information they find to assess its quality, according to a recent survey. Some other things the survey found:
•    7 percent of U.S. Internet users had searched for information on a health topic or medical problem on a typical day.
•    15 percent of those surveyed said they always checked the source and date of the health information found online.
•    10 percent said they did so most of the time.
•    75 percent said they checked the source and date sometimes, hardly ever or never.
Is it ever a good idea to try to self diagnose yourself using the internet? Does it make you a hypocondriac?
Ladies, if you’re out socializing, how do you know a guy is gay or not? Most women who called us said that they could even tell from a distance if a man was gay or not. We then opened up the phones to find out what tips them off.
You grab an aspirin or uncover a prescription drug that used to soothe your back pain, and then notice the expiration date is long past. Should you use the medicine, or not? Some pharmaceutical experts are fond of pointing to a study done for the U.S. Army that found that many drugs were still usable nearly five years after the expiration date. But other experts say it isn’t worth the risk and you should toss old drugs. Have you ever taken “old” drugs? Did you get sick? Are they still good even after the expiration date?
What is the nicest thing someone has ever done for you. We talked about a story in Boston, where a bunch of firefighters put out a blaze in a woman’s apartment on Thanksgiving. Her kitchen was torched and so was her Thanksgiving dinner. Hours later, after putting out her fire, the fire department returned with turkey, stuffing and eight pies. Boy, if that one doesn’t get you teary-eyed, I’m not sure what story will.
I read a rumor online that Wil Wheaton of “Star Trek: The Next Generation” fame would have an upcoming cameo on TV’s “Heroes”. So we asked our listeners, what superpower Wil Wheaton should have if he goes on the show. And while we were at it, we asked what superpower you’d like to have. Personally, I’d like the power to levitate.
So are mom’s of today spending more or less time on housework? According to a recent survey, most modern women do four hours of housework a week �” half that of 30 years ago. It must mean that men are doing some of the chores now right? Not according to listeners who called us. Most people said that men aren’t pulling their fair share. As more women go back to work, they’re expected to still do all the household chores. Are men doing their fair share of housework in 2008?
What clothes and fashions shouldn’t you wear if you’re over 50? Here to help: “Over 50″ Fashion No Nos from AOL.
•    Awful After 50: They’re nicknamed “granny panties” for a reason – oversized underwear can rapidly age a woman both mentally and appearance-wise.
•    Awful After 50: Wearing pantyhose with sandals is a definite no-no at any age, but the older one gets, the more frequently this rule seems to be broken.
•    Awful After 50: Unless you’re Tina Turner, chances are that your triceps and biceps are best under the cover of your clothing, so steer clear of sleeveless clothing.
•    Awful After 50: A little cleavage may be sexy, but showing off your decollete in a super-low V-Neck can appear desperate at any age, but especially as you become older.
•    Awful After 50: Too much bling is not a good thing for the graceful ager, so stay away from too many strands, rings, clips, pins and other shiny things.
•    Awful After 50: Except for the occasional aerobics class exception, hair scrunchies are entirely inappropriate for any woman over the age of five, rather less 50.
More than a third of U.S. workers played hooky from their jobs over the last year. 35 percent say they have called in sick once in the past year when they were really faking it, and 10 percent are serial fakers who have done this three or more times in the past year. Phoner: Have you ever faked being sick to stay home from work? What was your best excuse? Did the boss buy it?
We were talking about junk mail the other day. We ended up discussing magazine subscriptions. This lady called in with 19 different subscriptions! It turns out she buys one every time she’s offered a discount on one when she buys one. Find out who subscribes to the most magazines in your audience.
We opened up the discussion that men are more honest than women because a man would tell his friend if he was getting fat or had a blemish while women would lie to their friend and then talk about her behind her back. The phones went nuts from both men and women arguing both sides. Surprisingly, many women agreed that men were more honest. We capped it off by proving our point: We each pointed out what we feel are major flaws with one another live on the air. It was painful, but compelling.
Did your dad ever actually turn the car around? You know, after saying, “you kids knock it off or I’m turning this car around!” Mine never did, but we got some interesting calls from people whose fathers did. One lady said they turned around and went straight home after just one hour on vacation. Do young parents still use this approach? As far as the ‘ol, “are we there yet?” questions went, I always just told my son, “yes, we are.” Since we obviously weren’t there yet, it used to drive him crazier than his questions drove me and he’d drop it.
If you want a guaranteed phone starter then try this on for size. Ask listeners to call in and tell you about the worst way they were dumped by their significant other. Women have the best stories, probably since most guys are pigs.
WEIRD NEWS
Help! My Husband Took Viagra!
In Palermo, Italy, 69-year-old Carla di Stefano called police after her 82-year-old husband, Giovanni, took Viagra! Carla said he was so excited she thought he would have a heart attack. The police didn’t really do anything once they arrived but their presence had the desired effect. He lost interest in his love life pretty quickly. Carla later told police, “I was terrified. He’s 82 and I thought so much love could have lethal consequences.” (Ananova)
It Doesn’t Get Much Sicker Than This
This is about as demented as it gets. 33-year-old Christopher S. Johnson, an Ohio State University academic adviser, and 42-year-old real estate agent Rusty Blades have been arrested after they allegedly held a $10-a-ticket raffle that offered an evening with a prostitute! The event, held in Rusty’s home, was organized through a Craigslist.com chat board. Both Johnson and Blades were charged with promoting prostitution. But here’s the worst part. The alleged prostitute was identified as 31-year-old Vanise Dunn — who has worked at Franklin County Children’s Services since 2000 — as a child sex abuse case worker! She has been on paid leave since her arrest while the agency is looking into whether she violated any of its policies. What??? You’ve got to look into that? You don’t already know?? You mean to suggest that it just may be possible that it’s perfectly okay with Franklin County Children’s Services that your child sex abuse case workers can moonlight as whores? What the hell? (myway.com)
The Good Lord Made Me Do It
In San Antonio, Texas, a guy who rammed his truck into a woman’s vehicle on Highway 281 while going over 100 mph told police he did it because God told him, “she needed to be taken off the road.” The truck rear-ended the car and both vehicles then spun across a median then came to a stop along a barrier in the opposite lanes. Both drivers suffered only minor injuries. Bexar County Sheriff’s Office spokesman Kyle Coleman said, “He just said God said she wasn’t driving right, and she needed to be taken off the road. But God must have been with them, ’cause any other time, the severity of this crash, it would have been a fatal.” Interesting — there was no trace of alcohol in either driver. The truck driver has been ordered to take a psych evaluation. (myway.com)
Double Drunk Drivers!
Police on Long Island say it’s a first — pulling over two drunk drivers from the same car! Nassau County officers say they spotted a woman trying to make a three-point turn on a city street but clearly couldn’t complete the maneuver. So she switched places with a male passenger, who took the steering wheel and completed the turn while not wearing a seat belt. Police eventually pulled them over and discovered both were intoxicated. Both now face drunken driving charges. (Newsday)
Oh Deer!
In Sedalia, Missouri, hunter Randy Goodman bagged a big 9-point buck on the second day of hunting season — or so he thought. Randy was sure the two well-placed shots with his .270-caliber rifle had killed the buck and the deer definitely looked dead to him. But seconds later the 240-pound animal rose up, knocked Randy down and attacked him with his antlers in what the veteran hunter called “15 seconds of hell.” The deer then ran a short distance and went down, and died after Randy fired two more shots. That’s when Randy started feeling dizzy and noticed his vest was soaked in blood. He managed to get back to his truck and drive himself to the hospital where he received seven staples in his scalp and was treated for a slight concussion and bruises. Somewhere in a forest in Missouri other deer are high-fiving and making “whoop whoop” noises! (The Sedalia Democrat)
Dealing With Conmen the Chinese Way
Say what you will about China — but they know how to deal with their conmen! Wang Zhendong was arrested and convicted of being the leader of a bogus scheme for breeding ants to make aphrodisiacs that conned investors out of $439 million dollars. Wang promised investors in the fictitious projected returns of 35 to 60 percent. One investor committed suicide after realizing he had been duped, while many others suffered from depression and financial ruin. But he won’t do it again. They just executed Mr. Zhendong. Case closed. (Xinhua News Agency)
They Don’t Call It Black Friday For Nothing!
It really was a Black Friday in Palm Desert, California, where we have learned two men actually shot and killed each other at a crowded Toys “R” Us store on the day after Thanksgiving. 39-yeasr-old Alejandro Moreno and 28-year-old Juan Meza were found dead at around 11:30 a.m. outside the store. Two handguns recovered at the scene indicate the two men shot each other. No one else in the packed store was injured during the melee. Witnesses say the men produced guns after women they were with got into an altercation with each other. As the men ran shooting at each other, frantic shoppers dropped their purchases and sought cover. Merry Christmas. (AHN News)
MATCH THE MOUTH
“As a child, I was obsessed with space travel. I only wanted to be an astronaut. The idea just blew my mind.”
•    Phil Collins
•    Dido ***
•    Simon Cowell
•    Sting
•    Ron Howard
“If we feel it’s important to our kids, we would get married”
•    Britney Spears
•    Nicole Richie
•    Hugh Hefner
•    Brad Pitt ***
•    Angelina Jolie
“Because of the Greek-girl thing, I have, like, boobs and butt. As a result, I only have two speeds – either matronly or a little too slutty. I have to be steered away from cheetah print.”
•    Rita Wilson
•    Nancy Pelosi
•    Tina Fey ***
•    Christina Aguilera
•    John Stamos
ROMANTIC WORD OF THE DAY
We announced the word or phrase every morning at 7:20 and then when listeners heard it repeated throughout the day caller number ten would qualify for concert tickets & backstage passes. The fun part of this contest was the twist that we put on it. We would pick the romantic word or phrase ourselves that morning and then surprise each jock as they came in for their shifts. Our romantic words were: “rug burn,” “hickey,” “lubrication,” and “oh yeah, you’re my daddy, you’re my daddy, I’m a dirty, dirty girl, stud.” Each jock had to fit these words or phrases into their show conversations somehow. It was fun to hear the extra creativity each person put into the contest.
TOP FIVE SIGNS THE HOLIDAY SEASON HAS GOTTEN AWAY FROM YOU
1.    Everyone on your list this year is getting gum
2.    You’re just now sending out last year’s Christmas cards
3.    Your family draws everybody else’s name and someone get your name as a penalty
4.    Try as hard as you like, no one buys that’s a Christmas pumpkin on the porch
5.    After a year’s worth of teasing about the Christmas tree still being up, NOW who’s the smart one?
HUNTER’S HUMOR by Tim Hunter
While in England to talk with the prime minister, Condoleezza Rice took time out to play the piano for the queen. No, not Elton John… the main queen: Elizabeth the 2nd.
In Texas, a man claims that God told him to smash into another driver at 100 mph. Well, of course, God wouldn’t be afraid to drive that way. What’s the worst thing that could happen? He could crash and end up back with himself?
Economists have made it official: they confirm that we’re in a recession. If you would, please imagine the loudest “duh” you’ve ever heard before.
Here’s Elvis Presley, singing, “I’m Gonna Have a Blu-Ray Christmas Without You.”
Barack Obama is giving his wife a $30,000 ring to say thanks for being by his side. Oprah only had three words to say: “What about mine?”
WRITE THAT WILL
Maxim gives us these tips about death and taxes: how to prepare for one while reducing the other:
•    Die like a pro — Even a singing mistake can weaken your Will’s validity, and it only takes one greedy nephew to tie it up in court for months and lop off up to eight percent of your estate in legal fees. Skip the Web sites and get a flesh and blood attorney to draft you an airtight document.
•    Build Trust — According to David T. Phillips, author of State Planning Made Easy, leaving everything to your spouse could mean losing 25 percent of a $4 million estate to taxes. Shelter half of that in a Bypass Trust instead: Wifey gets paid, the kiddies get their tax-exempt tax.
•    Beyond the grave — Unless you want your trust fund baby living as an “artist” in a $3 million loft purchased with your retirement, set some rules. Whether it’s graduating college, getting married, or turning 30, any milestone can determine when they receive your hard earned dough.
•    Live and die — Real estate is a great investment… till taxes are due. To pay off death taxes imposed on your home or business, jack up your life insurance policy, otherwise you’ll lose the assets just to pay the IRS. Just $12,000 in payments can cover an estate tax bill of $1 million.
INCARCERATION POOL
Every time a celebrity or political figure gets arrested for any reason each member of the morning show in throws in $5 for another pick in the “Incarceration Pool.” When one of their predicted celebrities gets busted, that show member gets all the money in the pool.
THE WHINE LINE
Listeners get 10 seconds to air the gripes (basically whine). I hang up on them and move to the next caller once the 10 seconds is up. Edit the calls real tight so that once you say, “Whine line…” they’re whining. Run maybe three or four calls each time you do it. It’s really great when someone really is getting into it and… click… you move on to the next caller.
TOP 10 THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER SAY TO HER
Askmen.com says there are some instances when you are better off either shutting up or telling a little white lie — or risk spending the night on the couch.
1.    Man, you look so much like your mom!
2.    I would have invited you, but you’re no fun.
3.    Anything related to marriage or children.
4.    Would have, could have, should have.
5.    You don’t need another pair of shoes.
6.    Any story about your private life.
7.    Come on, a few little cramps never hurt anybody.
8.    What’s the big deal? You have another birthday next year.
9.    Are you sure the dress shrunk?
10.    That’s not the way my ex did it.
BILLBOARD FOR YOUR SPOUSE
My friend’s wife is smoking three packs a day. He wants her to quit so he’s checking into what it would cost to buy a billboard with the message, “I love you _____, please stop smoking.” If you were going to buy a billboard for your spouse what would it say? Buckle up? Please pick up your clothes? Please put the seat down?
HEADLINE TRUTH OR TRASH
“Astronauts Will Soon Drink Their Own Pee!”
Truth! Astronauts aboard the International Space Station told Mission Control in Houston that their new urine recycler has passed the test and is working just fine! However, further testing will be conducted back on Earth on samples of processed urine, sweat and condensation before astronauts can start drinking the stuff. The $154-million system, distils, filters, ionizes and oxidizes wastewater, including urine, into fresh drinking water. Yum, Yum!
“Britney Spears to Record Album with Ghost of Mother Teresa!”
Trash! The Ghost doesn’t want anything to do with Britney
“Boy’s Heart Is Growing Outside His Body”
Truth! Doctors in China are trying to figure out what to do with a four-year-old boy whose heart is growing on the outside of his stomach. The heart is covered in only a layer of skin under which it can easily be seen beating. Kind of looks like someone attached a tennis ball to his chest and covered it with plastic wrap. Not freakish at all.
“Obama Plans to Spend Way Out of Recession Through Ring Industry!”
Trash! But if he does want to try that, he’s well on his way.
“Woman Celebrates The Wrong Birthday 106 Times!”
Truth! Lena Thouless of England has accomplished something all of us would like to do — celebrating 106 birthdays. Unfortunately she’s been doing it wrong her entire life. Some family tree detective work by her daughter revealed that in fact, Lena was born on November 22 — not the November 23rd date she has celebrated her entire, long life. Nobody can figure out how her parents got it wrong all these years.
“Star of Bethlehem to stop over Washington, DC!”
Trash! Besides, there won’t be any wise men there until after January 20th.
“Family Has Their Thanksgiving Dinner Stolen!”
Truth! In Oregon, Wisconsin, Lillian Moore’s daughter is struggling with finances so Lillian brought over an entire Thanksgiving feast for her daughter’s family. The food was left on the front porch in a cooler as there wasn’t enough room in the fridge. But before they could bring it inside and enjoy it — some lame thief stole it right off the front porch. The disabled single mother didn’t bother reporting the theft to police and her mother told reporters, “It’s just awful to steal from people who don’t have much.”
“President Bush Invites Cousin Eddy and Family to White House for
Christmas!” Trash! This year is Cousin Clark’s year to host Christmas.
“Germany Faces Santa Shortage!”
Truth! Germany is running out of qualified Santa Clauses and needs to recruit and train them fast! Jens Wittenberger, a recruiter in charge of finding qualified Santa’s for the Job Cafe Employment Agency says “Being Santa is not an easy job. To be honest, not many people have what it takes to be a good Father Christmas.” The agency wants its Santas to be child-friendly, good organizers, reliable and have acting skills. They also need a clean police record.
YOU DIDN’T CALL
When a man goes out with a woman, he should not call her for a couple days after the date, according to sharpman.com, which offers advice to men. Here’s why:
•    Because if she liked you, waiting a day or two will not change that. If she didn’t like you, why call so soon and further annoy her? Give her a day or two to forget, and then try again.
•    In the event she’s “on the fence”: Absence really does make the heart grow fonder. Also, women always want what they perceive they cannot have. But remember, you asked her out and thereby affirmed her desirability. Now she’s in the position of accepting you or rejecting.
•    Your aim is to turn those tables right around.
•    You let her wonder. You motivate her to silently ask: Why haven’t you called again? Wasn’t she the vision of loveliness she thinks she is?
Phoner: What’s the biggest mistake a guy has made with you after the first or second date?
GORSEFEATHERS by Patrick Gorse
Actress Marg Helgenberger has split from her husband Alan Rosenberg after a 19 year union. CSI: Marriage…
Brad Pitt says that the best meal Angelina Jolie ever cooked for him was “cereal.” I know one guy who may not have a “Holly Jolie Christmas.” I guess with some people it’s barefoot, pregnant and not in the kitchen.
Last week, the FBI issued a warning about a possible terror plot against the New York City subway system. Authorities describe the plot as “aspirational,” not operational. You know, like Sarah Palin’s brain.
They interviewed Eliot Spitzer’s hooker, Ashley Dupre, on “20/20.” After Ashley realized she’d been servicing the Governor of New York, and every reporter in the country was banging on her door, Ashley wrote in her diary, “I don’t remember it being this hard. I has to be easy for me.” You see, Ashley doesn’t understand “easy.” Easy is when you do it, and don’t ask for 4,000 dollars afterwards.
I saw this on NBC News. New York City has joined a program that donates old subway cars to a marine group that dumps them in the ocean to create artificial reefs. They just dump the New York subway cars offshore. The same thing happens to New Jersey subway riders.
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke writes in a new book that the first time he had a meeting with George Bush; the president couldn’t stop talking about Bernanke’s socks. It’s kind of like the time President Bush held arms talks in Russia with Vladimir Putin, and Mr. Bush kept asking, “So what kind of chickens lay them Faberge eggs?”
The American auto industry is in turmoil, and car dealerships aren’t moving any vehicles off the lot. Now dealers can honestly say they “service every car they sell,” even if they’ve laid off their entire service department.
A woman has been arrested for burning the word “wimp” into her child’s neck with a cigarette. And just when you thought Britney was getting back on the right track…
Barbara Bush is doing wonderfully after going through emergency abdominal surgery last week. Good luck to Barbara. A lot of Republicans are having trouble stomaching Barack Obama.
Under siege because of huge financial losses and tanking stock share values, Citigroup is reorganizing and downsizing. From now it will be known as “Itty Bitty CitiGroup.”
Barack Obama is promising to invest billions into the nation’s infrastructure, especially large bridges and highways. Which would be a great idea if the three major auto companies weren’t about to go belly up…
Some economic experts say that the drop in the Gross Domestic Product this year compared to the drop in the GDP in the last 9 recessions isn’t so bad. Of course, no one really cares about the GDP when they don’t have a J.O.B.
A car carrying one of Israel’s top mafia kingpins exploded last week, killing him. Authorities say his death may set off a wave of bombings and other violence across Israel. My question is–how could we tell?
Opposition to the US-Iraq security agreement has created an unlikely association between the Shiite followers of anti-American cleric Moktada al-Sadr and some influential Sunni leaders. Well, you know what they say; politics makes strange “Bedouin” fellows.
New Kids On the Block member Donnie Wahlberg says he almost died after falling asleep while driving. What a coincidence! I fell asleep while listening to the latest New Kids song — I wasn’t driving, but I wished I was dead.
The late Tim Russert was honored Sunday by the Buffalo Bills football club who paid tribute to their greatest fan by dedicating a stadium plaza in Tim’s name. In a related story, Tom Brokaw was honored by the last surviving member of the 1970’s Washington Redskins “Over-The-Hill-Gang, who stayed awake all the way through Sunday’s broadcast of “Meet the Press.
President-elect Barack Obama has named Dr. Susan Rice to be U.S. Ambassador to the U.N. So even though Condi is leaving Washington, there will still be Rice on the White House menu.
ABC News anchor Charlie Gibson interviewed President Bush this week and asked him to define the Bush Doctrine. Mr. Bush replied, “The-who-in-the-what-now?”
Sunday on “Meet the Press,” Laura Bush told Tom Brokaw that when the Obama daughters, Malia and Sasha, visited the White House, her daughters, Barbara and Jenna, “showed them the fun things” they could do there, like “crawling under” big desks. To which Bill Clinton replied, “Aren’t they a little young for that?”
On Monday, speaking about the terror attacks in Mumbai, President-elect Barack Obama said, “We cannot tolerate a world where innocents are killed by extremists based on twisted ideologies.” President Bush responded, “I know just what Barack means. I can’t tolerate twisted pretzels. They get stuck in my throat.”
On Monday, the FBI arrested Birmingham, Alabama, Mayor Larry Langford on criminal charges of conspiracy, money laundering, fraud and accepting bribes of more than $200,000 involving a multi-billion dollar sewer bond deal. Investigators got suspicious when Mayor Langford’s financial disclosure forms didn’t pass the smell test.
That Mayor Larry Langford who was arrested on charges of conspiracy, money laundering, fraud and accepting bribes involving a multi-billion dollar sewer bond deal… he was released on bond — which was a little suspicious because he paid it in sewer bonds.
Arrested over sewer bonds… How do you make that sound cool in prison? “What are you in for?” “The charge is Bonds… Sewer Bonds.”
I tell ya’… the economy is in rough shape. I walked into an Old Navy store; it had been taken over by Somali pirates.
The stock market lost 680 points on Monday. It dropped faster than the people in that nightclub when Plaxico Burress’s gun went off.
It was announced officially on Monday that the U.S. economy has been in a recession since December 2007. Of course, conservative economists tried to put a positive spin on it. They said the fact that we’ve already been in a recession for a year means we’re that much closer to the end. Yeah, the end of the problem you caused and have been lying to us about. Can we slap you now — or will you do the honorable thing and slap yourselves?
Did you know slaves helped to build the White House? When Barack Obama was asked what he thought about living in a house that was built by slaves he said, “Being biracial, I have mixed feelings.”
A gunman shot an employee at a Philadelphia K-Mart this morning. Luckily, it was near the Martha Stewart Living section, so Martha pulled out her shiv and stabbed the guy.
Last week’s box office smash, “Twilight” dropped to #3 in just seven days. That’s the way it is with twilight. It’s gone just like that.
WHAT HIS TOUCHES REVEAL
(Cosmopolitan) It’s no secret that men aren’t big on talking about their feelings. Luckily, their bodies communicate for them.
•    The sideways lean in — You’ll notice this gesture when you’re sitting next to each other on a date. It is subtle and might seem like an accident, for example, you brush shoulders sharing a menu, but it may be calculated contract to gauge your interest. To him, it’s a safe way to see how you react he won’t lose face if you pull back.
•    The playful punch — This grade school move is what guys revert to when they like you but have no clue how to verbalize it, or they’re too nervous to. Men also relate to one another by roughhousing, so your date may be trying to establish a bond.
•    The hand on the back — If a guy does this, to guide you through a crowd or a doorway, he wants to make a good impression and let you know he’s a gentleman. Just be aware of where he positions his palm, if his hand creeps lower than the center of your back, he may be testing how far you’ll let him go physically.
SUREFIRE SUBJECT LINES
Want to be sure you’ll hear back on your emails? It takes a little thought to make sure yours get opened. Time to send an e-mail. But how are you going to stand out from the crowd? True.com surveyed active members to get their most successful e-mail subject lines. They found the more personalized the e-mail, the more response you’re likely to get. Plus, people respond well to humor. Here are the Top 6 subject lines:
1.    Want to know a secret? — Nobody can resist a secret. Were you ever left out when your friends were telling secrets when you were a kid? Weren’t you dying to know? This one’s a winner.
2.    You’ll never guess what happened after my last e-mail — This works best when followed by a sentence that personalizes it for the recipient. The first sentence of the email could read “… I didn’t get to meet you. I’m glad I get to now.”
3.    You’ll swear by me, not at me — Members we surveyed reported humor as their best technique for getting email opened. However what you find funny might not make somebody else laugh, so run it past a friend first. You have to funny, not whiny and not obnoxious.
4.    We have something in common — The best approach is to personalize the e-mail with details out of the member’s profile. This shows that you cared enough to read the profile and make an effort. A weaker version of this is to say that the thing you have in common is your desire to meet someone online, and then to talk quite frankly about your experience doing this. Most people appreciate honesty. Another version of this is: “We have a friend in common — each other” (which, strictly speaking, isn’t a logical statement, but when you’re trying to start a conversation, who’s counting?)
5.    Your screen name rhymes with _____! — For instance, if someone’s screen name is Paulb, you might say “your screen name rhymes with date me” or if your screen name was TrueDish, you might says “your screen name rhymes with my wish.” An alternate version of this is to say something off the wall, but engaging, for names that have no rhymes like “your screen name reminds me of my second grade teacher.” And in the email … “Were you Mrs. ScaryOrange at Pearson Elementary in 1985?” And then go on to be funny.
6.    Adventures in dating — Tell what those adventures could be, but don’t be pornographic.
TOP FIVE LEAST-WANTED CHRISTMAS GIFTS
1.    A membership in the “Fruitcake of the month” club
2.    Official Rocky Balboa Metamucil
3.    A gift card for that weird store in the mall, “Just figs”
4.    Anything from Taco Bell * A copy of Jessica Simpson’s new book, “Blank pages for Dummies”
ASK A MALL SANTA
We solicited for a caller that was or is currently working as a mall Santa. Once we received our Santa, we proceeded with questions that we had always been curious about (Are mall Santa’s really alcoholics? Do you get sick of kids? What do you do when you have a really fat kid? Etc.). We also opened the phone lines and solicited calls from listeners on questions. This turned out to be a very entertaining bit and very informative as well. Hey! Haven’t you always wanted to know those things about the mall Santa?!

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